First day of October

 

You fill my days with happiness,

You took away my distress

You never fail to make me feel special

Thank God I have you now

 

It was you who I prayed to have,

the only one I wanna love

It was you who I wish to hold

In every minute of my life

 

Baby, you're the one who I wanna spend

my life with,

the one I wanna grow old with

So please, don't ever leave me

For my life without you would never be complete

Author's Note

Hello there. Feel free to read and review my short poem. It would help a lot to improve my writings. Thank you. :)

Reviews

[Celeste21]

I think it is great how the speaker of the poem is filled w/ so much intense happiness, and anyone can relate to these emotions, but I think what will make this poem more complete and personal is if you give anecdotes as to why this person feels your day w/ happiness. Such as:
Before I even wake/ He turns over strokes my hair and kisses my cheek...

I am understanding that this person fills you w/ intense love, but I'm not getting a better depiction of WHY that is. And if you put more detail about what is so special about this person i.e: funny quirks etc. I will better be able to identify/ relate to the feelings you are trying to pull forward. Making your poem way more powerful and personal.

Perfect for a sweet greeting card or small msg's left for when your love comes home. :)

[Vivek Koshy]

Short, Sweet; would make wonderful use in cards!!

[kaylynnmelody♥]

yes it was short, but oh, so, beautiful. you are an artist with your words. (: thanks for sharing this beautiful poem.

[SpokenWord]

My it seems the heart is soaring and love is truly in the air. It is something when you find your soul mate and it is even more special when someone feels this way about you as you have written above. A lover's Paradise written beautifully by you.

[mir]

Very well expressed with strong feelings---would make great lyrics to a song!

[KAREN]

Deep! And full of emotions. We all wish we could have that someone in our lifes to grow old with!

[SilentSKY]

Omg this was fantastic! I could almost feel the powerful emotion... great work! :)

[Worms]

great job on this poem
good dialouge and fantastic feeling
I can relate
great job