Chapter 1
It was quite as the priest said mass. Everyone had a bible in their hand, reading along with him. It sounded like no one was alive, it was dead silent. Everyone was dressed in black, mourning the death of Jasper Winston. I was mourning the love we shared.
Jasper was my husband, widowing me at age 21; I was barely an adult, though legally I was. I still acted like a child, but saw more in life than a 72 year old who's been in war. I've seen much more, things beyond imagination. I've seen love, life, death, murder… but I'm getting ahead of my self.
I am Sara Night. A 21 year old woman, who's had only one love, which was taken away from by the Devil. Jasper, he was my best friend, my lover, my husband… my life. When he was gone I didn't know what to do, I never thought about committing suicide, but that was an option. No, things are better if I stay.
I looked around me; I was in the front pew, only because I knew the deceased. The church was old; it had high ceilings, and large pillars. Everything was mostly made of brick except the pews; they were red wood, with red velvet cushions. The very little people here were in the first two pews all friends and family. No more no less.
Sitting next to me on my left was Jasper's older sister, Rebecca, my sister in law. She was a pretty woman. She had long, straight, light brown hair, and a sweet oval shaped face. She had a pointed nose that was a decent length. She would put her hair behind her pointed ears that made her look like and elf. Her lips were thin and long. She had large, brown, round, sweet eyes that showed kindness and happiness. Today they looked sad and empty. Her usual smile was replaced with a large frown.
Jasper's father, Greg was sitting next her. He was 46 but didn't look a day over 35. He still had a full head of hair and so did Greg's father. It was a good chance that Jasper would have turned out the same way. His wife, Ashley looked much like Rebecca but her hair was cut short and wavy. They were all reading along in the bible. I looked to my right none of my family was here; they all thought I was stupid for marrying Jasper.
I was 18 and he was my age now, 21. They said he stole me from them when really they were pushing me away, they hated me and Jasper, especially my mother hated us. She convinced my father that I was no good and was a sin to the family. I didn't care nor did I care about them, they didn't come to my wedding and now they won't come to my husband's funeral. I'd best just forget about them.
My friend Lila was here though she sat behind me. She didn't know Jasper all to well but she knew how much I loved him.
A tear rolled down my cheek the first one of the night. I looked out one of the windows. It was raining and today was when Jasper was getting buried. I brushed away the tear with the back of my hand. I felt a gentle hand on my shoulder. It was Lila. I turned and she was smiling sympathetically. I smiled back and turned to look at the priest. He looked up from the bible he was reading and closed it.
"Does anyone have any last words for Jasper Winston?" he asked.
One man stood up, he was one of Jasper's old friends. He started his speech with the usual "he was a great man…" I didn't pay much attention to the speeches people were making and just thought of Jasper and how I knew him. He loved me and I loved him, he was kind and would do anything for me, even if it meant risking his life. My sight started to get blurry with tears, and they all rolled down my face. I pulled out a tissue from my purse and wiped them away.
Once everyone who had a speech said them we all lined up to see Jasper for the last time before he was buried. I was the last person to see him. I did it on purpose; I didn't want to hold up the line behind me while I said my good-byes.
It finally came to be my turn. I looked down at him. His face was pale and calm against his straight, long jet black hair. He had an oval face like his sister, mother and father. He had green almond shaped eyes and high check bones, a pointed nose like his sister and long lips. He seemed so lovely and lonely lying there in the coffin. I touched his cheek, soft, gentle and cold. I leaned over him to have a good long last look, as I did a tear dropped from the tip of my nose and landed on his eyelid rolling down his cheek as if he cried with me. I leaned my head downward to meet his. Nose touching nose, I made my lips meet his and gave him one last soft and loving kiss. I rested my hand over his left breast as I moved my head from his. As I walked away I brushed my hand against his cheek and turned as I heard him whisper my name in his soft, melodic voice.
I followed the six men who carried the black coffin outside into the pouring rain. I watched as we walked down the steps of the church to the black hearse where the men put Jasper. I looked into the small window hoping to see something other than the coffin and black curtains, no such luck. I stood still while the hearse drove off leaving me in the rain.
"Sara," Lila said my name sorrowfully. She was crying too.
I turned to meet her gaze. "Yeah,"
"We have to go… you can ride with me in my car."
I just nodded and followed her to her silver Volvo.
I didn't pay much attention to the path we were going as I looked out the window. All I knew was we were going to a cemetery. I watched the rain drops fall down the glass and wondered what it was like facing death.
"Death," I whispered to my self, Lila didn't seem to hear. It sounded like a beautiful word just then. I would realize later that it was beautiful.
When we got to the cemetery I noticed many of the round, cross, and square shaped headstones. The hearse was parked up a small road leading into the back part of the cemetery. Lila held an umbrella over us as we walked.
We found the small crowd around Jasper's new headstone already placed. The same six men from earlier brought out Jasper in his coffin and set him on the machine that would lower him into his grave. The priest said some last few words before Jasper was lowered down to become one with the earth.
I watched as the grave was filled with dirt. Wondering where Jasper would go. Heaven or Hell? If there were such places.
Everyone walked back to the funeral home so we could say good-bye to friends and family.
"Sara," Rebecca's voice came from behind me, "I'm glad J-Jasper married you. He had always told me how beautiful you were, and how he never loved like how he loved you." She smiled sadly and started to cry. "It's too bad were now not sisters, I loved you like one."
I hugged her and she hugged back, I put my forehead on her shoulder (not needing to bend down with how short I am.) and started to cry. "Becca, no matter what you will always be my sister. I don't think I will ever re-marry, I loved your brother too much to betray him like that."
I could tell she smiled at that, she felt happier in my arms.
We let go of our embrace and wiped our eyes. "Rebecca I'm going to go to the bathroom right now, don't wait for me to come back. Okay?"
She nodded and walked away. I turned and walked toward the bathroom. I didn't really need to use the bathroom; I needed an excuse to get out, so instead I went out the back door to the cemetery to Jasper's grave. It was raining harder now and I was drenched from head to toe.
When I was at the grave I stared into the black stone at the head of the grave. Written on it, it said:
Jasper Nicholas Winston
Born, June 13th, 1984
Died, November 25, 2008
Last words,
You'll never make me leave
From the dim light around I was able to see in the headstone my reflection. I saw my pale heart-shaped face and my icy blue almond eyes surrounded by black makeup and tears, my shoulder length ebony hair drenched and sticking to my face. I could see my black strapless dress, with the red ribbon around my hips and the black dress tight around my waist showing my hour-glass figure. On my hand I saw a small glistening twinkle. I held up my hand and looked at it; on my left ring finger was my engagement ring: an onyx stone on a white gold band with a ruby on either side.
I put my forehead against the cold stone above of the grave and knelt down in the wet dirt and mud and whispered slowly, "Can you hear me? Are you near me? Can we pretend to leave and then, we'll meet again when both our cars collide?" I started to cry hard and long, I began to shake and have small hiccups. "Jasper, I guess this is so long and goodnight. I'll never forget you and the night you died."
I suddenly didn't feel rain drops hit me and heard what sounded like rain on a roof; I looked up and saw Lila above me holding an umbrella and a jacket. "You look like you need this." She said handing me the jacket. I grabbed it and put it on. She gave me a one armed hug while holding the umbrella. I didn't hug her back I was too tired from crying and sitting in the rain and mud.
With her arm around me Lila walked me back to her car so she could take me home. I must have fallen asleep on the way to my apartment because I don't remember the car ride. Lila shook me gently and I woke up right away. We walked to the front of the apartment building and she walked back to her car.
When I got to my two bedrooms, 1 bath apartment I almost started bawling my eyes out again, instead I walked to the doorway of my bedroom Jasper and I shared and stared at it, I hadn't done anything to it except vacuum since Jasper died. Luckily my closet was the larger one in the other bedroom used as an office. I went into there and took off the jacket Lila gave me and then took off the rest of my clothes. I put on my robe and went to the bathroom and turned on the shower. When I got it to the right temperature I got in and stood there and let the heat waft over my cold aching muscles.
I washed my hair and face and thought about Jasper and when he died. That night, three weeks ago, November 25th was cold and windy. Jasper and I were doing what we usually did, kill. We did it for a living, some of the time we were paid by a guy who caught his girl friend cheating on him, or most of the time something a bit more serious. Sometimes we did it for fun, it happened to complete strangers, ones who pissed us off or did something bad. That night though should have been the night I died. It should have been me. But Jasper saved me and died instead. We got in a fight with about 3 guys our age. Jasper and I should have left but we were both drunk and really didn't know better. Jasper brought out his gun and I got out my switchblade. We were ready for the most part, but Jasper freaked out when the tall guy with long brown hair in a ponytail started hitting on me. The guy didn't even seem to notice I had flipped open the blade so I slashed his fore arm when he put it around me.
He yelled at me, "S**t! Mother f*****g b***h!" and he pulled out a pistol pointing it right at me, I was scared to death and couldn't move. The next thing I knew was Jasper had tackled him. Jasper had knocked the gun out of the guy's hand and had his gun on the guy's temple.
Jasper yelled at him, "If you ever, EVER hurt her I f*****g swear to God that-" BANG!! BANG!! I screamed I knew the gunshots weren't from Jasper but from a different person firing at him. I looked; the person who fired had short blonde hair and was pointing the gun at Jasper's back. The brunette under Jasper's body shoved him off and got up. I ran to Jasper and still gripping the switchblade, held him.
"Jasper? Oh Jasper honey speak to me." I pleaded starting to tear up. I brushed his hair out of his eyes, smudging some of his blood on his face, he looked at me sadly.
He spoke softly to me, "I love you babe."
"I love you too," I whispered back to him.
He spoke louder, talking to the blonde who fired, "You'll never make me leave…" and then he was gone.
I was out of the shower drying my hair dressed in my robe. I decided that tonight I would finally stop sleeping on the couch and sleep on the queen sized bed in my bedroom.
Tonight I didn't feel so alone, like Jasper was alive still and he was never gone and was always here with me. Hoping the feeling wouldn't leave I put on one of Jasper's tee-shirts and a pair of boxers to sleep in. I crawled into bed exhausted and depressed and pulled my legs up to my chest. As I lied there half asleep I felt like something was hugging me like how Jasper would from behind in bed. I put my hand behind me and nothing was there and the warm comforted feeling went away. I layed my arm in-front of me and again I could feel Jasper lying there with me… with that feeling still with me I drifted off to sleep.
That night I dreamt of Jasper and one of our killings. It was somewhat similar to the night he died but Jasper lived and it was two against one.
It was a paid job. Don't ask me what it was for, that part I forgot a long time ago. The person we had to kill was a male and was named Erik, he was tall, taller that Jasper, and had a good build. He was quite attractive for the most part but he was creepy, he had a scar from the top of his cheek bone to the corner of his mouth extending his smile. One thing I remember is he would mug people, rape the women, and then murder his victim.
My dream started with me walking down the street in the city and past an ally way. Jasper and I were "stalking" Erik and we knew he was down the ally- I was the bait. As I walked past the ally Erik was in he came up from behind me and covered my mouth holding me so I couldn't get out of his grip. He pulled me down the ally and behind a dumpster, I bit him and he held back and erg to scream.
Instead, he smacked me square across my face and I fell to the floor holding my cheek. He reached back to his back pocket. He grabbed out his gun and pointed it at me. I looked from his face to the barrel of the gun. It was right in front of my nose and… he fired.
I fell backward landing on my back. I didn't feel the landing. I saw myself lying there, around my head blood spilled; my face was splattered with blood and my eyes were open and scared. The blood reached my shoulders and started to stain my shirt. Erik ran off down toward the other end of the ally leaving my body. The blood flowed fast forming a puddle that my corpse layed in the middle of.
Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Read Request
My Library
Subscribe
Flag Writing