The monster from within

What I'm going through at them moment.

Self hate will consume all,

You look in the mirror and you despise what you see,

Your stomach is too big, 

Your thighs are too wide, 

Your fingers are too fat,

Your mind cannot hide.

A darkness ripples through you,

Astounding, full of hate;

Your face drops,

Your hands tense,

And yet you cannot cry.

"You're pathetic, so fat! Don't you dare!"

Shouts your mind when you try to feed your instincts.

No one knows, you're all alone,

Left to wallow in your pain.

"You're so thin! I wish I was you!"

Sigh the girls in your class.

"No you don't. No you don't!"

Screams your mind.

Your stomach aches, 

It hurts so bad,

You're being eaten from inside out;

But nothing is enough to make you feed,

And wreck your wildest dreams.

You lose the weight,

But it's not enough.

You must lose more,

You must lose more,

And you know you will succeed.

A never ending cycle will spin through your years,

You have to learn, 

But it's so hard,

To love the skin you're in.

The once raging cycle has come to an end,

But your body is so hurt,

It can't keep it down.

That is the cycle of the pain,

The living, breathing nightmare.

But as we know, 

We all must go,

And some of us go quicker.

Author's Note

Warning, triggering!

Reviews

[loowzerX]

I can totally understand this..but take care of yourself. very good write, for an 11 year old :)

[Kes]

Rosy!! Please don't do this to yourself! You're going to make yourself anorexic. For goodness sake if you don't care for your own health then think of the worry you're putting everyone else through.
I'm sorry I'm being so harsh, and you know i love you really (lol), but i just couldn't bear it if you made yourself ill.

Why did you put triggering at the bottom?! Surely that would be better at the top?! lol

On the other hand, great poem! I loved it. It was so descriptive. So painful, just to read it. I can't even begin to imagine what you're going through and that's why my advice is total s**t.
You know I'm around to talk.
Xx