nor when you're with doubt.

haven't written anything in forever. i had this stuck in my head at work so i gave it a shot. not impressed with it, but maybe it will kickstart something better.

i may be dead 

and my flesh a bit wormy

but that's no need to choke 

or act overly squirmy,

'cause my heart may not beat 

but i still have some feeling

in this beat up old chest 

which the skin from is peeling.

now,

i've come back from the grave

to tell you sincerely

that even in death,

-and yes i can say this truly-

that my love is eternal,

you'll not go without,

not when you're alone

nor when you're with doubt.

Reviews

[Lowesy]

For not writing anything in a while, it's a good start, although I know for sure of what you're capable of. The first rhyme, wormy and squirmy i don't think are the best.
I think what you're depicting here is a sense of unrest, in that case I wouldn't rhyme, you want it disjointed and unveiled. Remember punctuation also. Keep them coming though mate.

[audrie]

I love the gentleness of this poem and the true caring you've expressed. Very touching.