Nervous.

just a little quickie.

he looks at you

beautiful.

he looks at his shoes

scuffed.

he glances left 

at nothing in particular.

he looks at you

stunning...

he looks at you

beautiful.

straightening his back

handsome.

he looks at his shoes

scuffed.

he shuffles his feet

nervous.

he glances left

at nothing in particular.

rocking on his feet

hands stuffed in his pockets.

he looks at you

stunning...

he's smiling

hopeful.

he looks at you

beautiful.

straightening his back

handsome.

"Hi."

he looks down at his shoes

scuffed.

he shuffles his feet

nervous.

"So would you, uhh..."

he glances left

at nothing in particular.

rocking on his feet,

hands stuffed in his pockets.

"i mean..."

he looks at you

stunning.

he's smiling.

hopeful.

"Do you like coffee?"

Author's Note

i like the increasing thing going on. the concept came to me last night and so i wanted to try it out. didn't work how i would have liked it to but it's alright.

Reviews

[Ben Taylor]

This is interesting. At first I read it as he did all these actions multiple times, but when I realized what the intention was I re-read it and I found it to be very well done. The situation and emotions are slowly drip-fed into the piece, forcing the reader to full comprehend and focus on each small aspect of the poem until the entire picture is revealed. I like it--unique and intriguing.

[Emily B]

i like it