Now a rant for the gentlemen...

Originally written Thursday March 2, 2006 this rant was kind of a peace offering to some females who read my previous rant on yahoo 360 and decided to b***h me out about the problems men have. Normally I would just tell them to piss off and move on but I

Being part of the male sex I think I must ask a question for my fellow brothers; when will we evolve? It's been 300,000 years since the Neanderthals walked the earth and yet we haven't really changed. The only changes are the sports, beer, and technology. As far as sports go why do most men care? It fascinates me to no end that when a football, basketball, baseball, or whatever game is on any amount of guys in the area will become hypnotized instantly and will sit there and watch it for as long as it takes. It doesn't even have to be their team or favorite sport the will stare at it slack jawed nonetheless. I can see if you playing the game once in a while but why waste hours watching someone get paid ridiculous amounts of money to run back and forth while you sit there getting on the couch getting fat and drinking beer. We are a proud race indeed. On the subject of technology why is it that the cure for cancer eludes us yet we can send countless bits of information to every home at the speed of light on an object no bigger than the palm of your hand? I personally go back to my whole lack of evolution thing. Sure we are inventive but so were the cavemen of old. I'm starting to believe that Fire and the wheel were originally conceived for entertainment than for practical use. Can you picture cavemen surrounding a flame for its pretty colors and ability to burn things rather than warmth? Pushing round slabs of stones down a hill to see which one makes the bottom first, or pushing them around a large circle? This can be said for most advances in technology. Our instincts haven't past their primal stages either. All that any guy can think of in basest terms are in no order; Sex, violence, food, and shiny object. Most guys will try to argue the fact but when you think about it there is no argument. I myself don't bullshit the fact that all I think about is any of the mentioned above. Matter of fact I'm thinking off all of them at the same time right now as I write this. We males try to cover up our urges with simple delusions of justifying the means in a vain attempt to view ourselves as higher beings, but there is no need for it. Some people say that it's in every animal to have these urges. Maybe but most animals mate to spread its genetic code and multiply, we spread our genetic code across our girlfriend's face (crude but that's our fantasy ladies). Most animals eat only to survive, we eat fried, grilled meat to fill our appetites and gorge more than needed. Most animals fight for territory and to be alpha male, we do the same thing but also for pleasure and personal gratification. As for shiny objects I think only raccoons and some primates share our vice. When it comes to the unknown all we do is bang at it with a big stick or something similar and when that fails run away and ignore it until it goes away. I have more things to say about the male species but I wanted to keep this short so I'll just close without any witty remarks, eat a fried chicken leg, watch a replay of Manchester united play against Arsenal on a big screen TV, punch my roommate for no apparent reason, and hump the couch while thinking of Bettie Page.

 

 

I guess you didn't need that image in your head…

Reviews

[Raven Wilson]

Haha, Intersting rant although I can think of some other things to add to it. But then again i am afemale lol, so i supposed I have other issues with the male race.