figuring out why ive been quiet for so long. its all so tiring.

i cant run away anymore.

 

$250 a month loan.

$250 a month insurance.

goD knows how much a month

           woman.

 

she cries

every night.

 

its warranted.

 

the ghosts crowd her

theyve gotten

their pound from her.

 

they still want more.

 

she sees their faces

she cant run

cause theyre watching.

 

i cant run

becuase i signed a piece of

death warrant

 

promising

real nice like

i wouldnt.

Reviews

[KUFU]

A wonderful slice of yer life you have given us. I like the form. I was let down at the end however. Not in content, but in form. If yer gona forgo the punctuation, Allow the line-breaks to set the tone. You wrote:

"i cant run
because i signed a piece of
death warrant"

...a heavy concept to consider. I would have written:

i cant run
because i signed a piece of
death
warrant

...a small change, but effective in driving home the seriousness of such a thought/concept; after all, we're talking about the sanctity of marriage here. I think that line-break gives the reader a chance to digest what he/she has just read. The spacing underscores the seriousness of the statement.

[Christel Grady]

Wow. I'm speechless. This is so close to home it's disconcerting. Thank you.

[W.k.kortas]

This is wonderfully understated and matter-of-fact, all of which is underscored by the short stanzas and sentences and the lack of ornamentation. It's a picture of someone who, on the surface, seems very unemotionally connected to the unseen woman...and yet he stays. The simplicity of the language and the lack of showy verbiage and imagery belies the depth of the piece. This is writing that grows on you with repeated reading.