A VIEW TO ESCAPE

OK THIS IS ONE OF THOSE RUSH JOBS SO PLEASE EXCUSE IT IF YOU TAKE THE TIME TO READ IT AND HATE IT LOL.

A VIEW TO ESCAPE

I look through the window. Not much to see.

yet this view that I get is everything to me.

Just on the other side of the pane...so close, yet so far...

The sky, a deep unmarred blue,

just a hint of a tree swaying into view.

Day is withdrawing, here comes the night.

I want to escape,I just don't have the fight.

I sit here and look, trying to imagine me there.

On the other side of the glass, chains shucked off at last.

Seeping through the pane, free of all doubt.

At one with the view. I've finally got out.

no longer a watcher but a contributor too.

Contributing to what? Well that's up to you.

Author's Note

ok, I have a bad foot and am medicated up to the eyeballs so this may not read to you as it does to my floaty mind at the moment...I guess we will see lol

Reviews

[Inject Positivity]

a hint of pain moving in the poem... i can feel its words.... the title is very appropriate to the concept of the poem... nice choice of words.... "i want to escape, i just don't have the fight" this line hit the right tone of the poem.... clappings!!!

[hcarson]

thank you IP, i'm glad you liked it :)..maybe the medication isn't so bad after all ;)

[Inject Positivity]

yup.... you are welcome my dear frnd....

[Coyote Poetry]

Very good use of description.
"The sky, a deep unmarred blue,
just a hint of a tree swaying into view.
Day is withdrawing, here comes the night."
I liked the ending also. Good to bring the reader into the poem. The above lines were my favorite. Create vision and the close of a day. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[hcarson]

thank you so much coyote poetry, a lovely review better than i could have hoped for. very much appreciated :)

[Coyote Poetry]

I will come back later tonight and read more. I'm babysitting today.

[hcarson]

you have your hands full...well there is no end of stories on this site to read them to sleep and get some peace....in theory haha.

[apersonfullofthoughts]

I really liked this! Especially the end.

[hcarson]

thank you, your comments much appreciated :)

[V]

I like the floaty state of your mind combined with the longing to go out, it is nicely and easily expressed. Conveys a feeling everyone in their lives can relate to at least once.

[hcarson]

that was kinda what I was trying to portray. how at some point we all want something but get held back by ourselves and so we sit and watch others instead doing what we want to. thank you Vanessandthecat comments much appreciated

[V]

You've done that pretty good. Nice read.

[hcarson]

thank you :)

[V]

I meant to say well. Cannot delete the entire comment, I have issues with this website anyway.

[V]

You're welcome.

[hcarson]

lol that's okay, it isn't easy to use some things on this website I find, especially when u trying to add writing, it can be a nightmre

[V]

Yes, I agree. I cannot add anything at the moment because of the browser(s) and technical devices in general, I am forced to use (at least for now).

[hcarson]

the other day I used word then copy and pasted it coz it was doing my head in so much and being so unresponsive..grr

[V]

Copy and paste lol. The problem is it just doesn't save my poems anymore but I'll have my usual devices back by the end of next week and I'll be so relieved when everything works better again on here.

[hcarson]

yea I understand that, I mainly use a tablet and writing etc can be a nightmare on those at the best of times...for some unknown reason I had this..what I thought was a good idea..to sell my laptop a few weeks back...what the hell was I thinking lol

[V]

I mainly used my cell which worked nicely with wc but since a system update crashed it and it is being fixed, I have to use other, wc less effectively supporting devices...annoying...

[hcarson]

I hope you sort it soon, I have been looking at some of your writing, I like it a lot what I have seen...be a great shame if you couldn't get something on here because stupid technology!

[V]

Thank you so much. I have to leave for now but will be back soon..

[ANTO]

This has potential. The desire and the imagination carrying the speaker through the glass. What would be next - a cup of tea with a local poetry group would be a nice start.

[hcarson]

ohh it would have to be coffee for me lol..in a barrel!! thank you for your comment and taking the time to read, always appreciated :)

[ANTO]

One I.V. coffee drip coming up - *tapping forearm for veins* - espresso okay?
xD

[hcarson]

Oh yea just drip me up and im sorted..love it lol