Very nice, however I couldn't help but noticing that you didn't keep the meter constant. First it is ABCB, Then ABCA, Then AABC, Then ABCD (No Rhyme) Anyways good job, you might just want to fix this. Maybe it is just my prefrence though.
Dark, "impresion", deep and soul-clutching.
The character is powerful, seducing, terrifying, yet gentle and openhearted.
The setting is perfect - the mystical carnival of Venice, I assume, neverending masquerade, show, that won't stop until you die, and that is perfectly reflected in this writing.
"one, two, three".... life is like a dance, her life becomes a simple dance, her life will and with the dance, chilling, yet burning in flames of lust, deep passion.
I enjoy the refreshing view on the theme, well adopted, great write!
Thank you!
Very nicely done...the vampire waltz. I think this was very creative and well written. You painted the entire event in my mind with so little words, skillfully done.
YES they do.....smiles
I loved this!!! A slow dance that got faster
and then fizzled out.........made my heart race too.
loved this!!!
Thanks for sharing.
Kelley
Live. Love. Write.
I'm 20 years old. I've been writing since I was 4.
Writing is more than just a hobby. It's my passion, my drug, my therapy and my life.
twitter.com/snarkvenger
iaintbegginw.. more..