Jalcom's Cane

So I like to linger around the “unreviewed” section of this universe and this has been on the list for forever. I finally gave in to my curiosity and clicked in. I was more than a little shocked to find that it had reviews. I’m guessing this is another glitch of the site since it’s not being maintained. Hopefully a more recent date will allow actually unreviewed things to come to the top since this has actually received feedback.

Posted 2 Months Ago

Well, this certainly made me curious about the rest of the story....Will there be more?

I like the little tidbits of information that we get about the characters: "Copy the picture you made of me and tack it to the place where you are staying." Is his lover an artist?

This would be a nice prologue for a novel or short story. As far as polishing...I don't see anything in the narrative that really hung me up. So, good job. I'm sure that with some tweaking you could easily get the story to the place you want it to be.

Posted 17 Years Ago