Deception

Open your legs promiscuous woman

Those lips speak unspoken words

Or grovel on your knees instead

And cry to me about your worth

Acid tears dispel into musty air

You’re choking on your shame

Streams are molded on your face

I like to play this game

Poor, despicable unfortunate soul

Drowning in despair

Don’t cast those eyes black as coal

I’ve cast my sticky web

I’ve soiled your sheets

And fetched your heart in bed

Deemed wretched by default

You are a woman indeed

Now open your mouth a little wider

And obsequiously swallow my seed

A void of blues and blacks

Have settled under your eyes

I’ve had my way with you

Promiscuous woman

Again, you’re choking on your shame

If only you had known

I and deception are one in the same.

Reviews

[Ashley Arita]

Wow. This is a very dark poem, but I like it. It really pulls you in a world of madness and agony, and it carries this emotion and transforms it. The descriptions are really good, adding to the dark feel. For advice, I would maybe put more similes or metaphors, and more descriptions, but it's really good as it is.

[hormelchili]

Thank you so much for the review, love! It means a lot to me that you enjoyed it! I'll be sure to add in those little tidbits of similes and metaphors you suggested, I think that'll give it more of the spice it needs! Once again, thank you so much! Very appreciated!
-hormelchili