Herschel's Log - Entry One

Herschel’s Log

Sunday, March 9, 1941

I’m sitting on a bus full of strangers in a country I first saw yesterday. I know that this is the wrong place to begin my story, but if I don’t calm down I’ll probably throw myself out the window (which I imagine would only make things worse) and at this point writing is the only way for me to calm myself down.

Rebecca gave me this journal back in London. She shouldn’t have spent the money, but I’m glad I have it now. I hope she’s all right alone, but I guess she’s handling the sudden change of scene a lot better than me anyway. The whole time we were in London I couldn’t help but feel like I needed her more than she needed me. I need someone to get me through this, and without her I don’t know what I’ll do.

I sure as hell won’t be able to turn to anyone here. I’ll never tell anyone about what happened back home. It’s only not that I don’t want anyone to know, but I just can’t talk about it. It will kill me if I ever have to say it out loud. No one can know about Kristen.

I can see the gates of Wellington’s now. I’ve been waiting to see this place for the past two hours, for my whole life, really. Dad had talked about it for as long as I could remember. But I don’t relish it all. It’s not that I miss where I came from. There is nothing on earth that could make me go back. But though the past few weeks have been excruciating, they’ve gone incredibly fast. I don’t know if I can handle the world I’ve been tossed into. I need to make myself out to be a fairly normal student in about five minutes, and all this time alone with my thoughts isn’t exactly keeping me sane.

But Poland is far behind me, at least literally, and I know I have to leave everything else behind too.

The bus is stopped at the entrance. Apparently I’m the only one getting off here, so I guess they’re waiting for me. I don’t know what I’ll find behind the gates, but, like it or not, I’m going to find out.

Author's Note

From this point on, if you've already read passover, the story is basically the same. However, since it was becoming burdensome both to write and read four different narratives per chapter, each POV switch now gets its own shorter chapter. Let me know what you think of the new layout

If you haven't read the original version, just disregard all that and keep reading!

Reviews

[J Johnson III]

Very nice. You caught my attention. There are many questions I have about these characters that I want to know, lol.

[SquinklaPsyOps]

I’m not exactly sure what the message was, but I liked it. All of us are a little crazy, or we would go insane!

[GoldenAgeThinking]

I really enjoyed this opening, you did an outstanding job on description, I felt like i was actually there. I would really appreciate if you would read my first 4 chapters of my book The Road to Eros and review it. Looking forward to hearing from you

[Playing with Demons]

I love this!! I like how you did it in the style of the journal, how you gave some background information but not so much the reader is like
Why keep reading?
When I read that mystery part I definitely wanted to keep reading and I love the characters name and how he is a very relatable and sophisticated in a modern everyday way.
Cheerio!
Tallest Ant

[JGIII]

I like the journal approach. Second story that style I've read tonight. Since this is a rough draft per your profile, I'm sure you'll catch most of the errors.
There was a syntax error in this line: It’s only not that I don’t want anyone to know - I believe you transposed not and only.
I like the opening line. Pulls you in. Whole chapter's well written, makes you want to turn the page to see what happens next. Italics were well used, usually I find them distracting but it works here.

[Dakota]

The lonliness is as clear cut as the loss and there's almost a sense of fear. Story progression with the new mysteries about him is in tact which keeps the hook. I think each entry having it's own chapter's going to help keep each character his own man and allows us to piece them together individually. :o)

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[Daydreamer54]

I love the diary entry and Inwonder what happened between him and this kristen girl...
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[Coyote Poetry]

A very strong chapter. I like his thoughts and memories. You gave enough to make the story interesting and I like the new mysteries being born in this chapter. A excellent chapter.
Coyote

[.quan.011.]

It is good as far. I can't wait to read the rest of it. Although I still wonder what is the setting. Is it in the past, present, or future? i will find out on own.

[Arianna]

okay well i have read passover. so i think im just going to you know...skip to the bottom and see if there is anything i havent read yet... refresh my memory and all that! :) i love this book :) .novelists.elite.info.
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