Erich - Six.

Erich

            Hersch knew I was there. He locked eyes with me as soon as he stepped onto the platform. Maybe he saw me even earlier. Of course he had. I had been skulking under the stairs since before Jim and Rebecca and Gabe arrived. Blending in. Counted among the other rebels. If I decided to show myself, they would know me first as one of their own. If I stayed hidden, they would never know I was there.

            I was amazed how inconspicuous I looked in my street clothes. I had worn my uniform almost constantly for the past year. It was easy to forget that I was anything other than a Nazi. That it wasn’t inherently a part of me. Etched on my face or burned into my skin. It felt good to throw that identity off.

            Still I fought back against the ideas planted in my head by my training and my father. The natural aversion I felt towards the Jewish people made me feel unbearably guilty. I took a few deep breaths and thought about how much I wanted to stop believing everything my father believed. His hatred is not my hatred, I thought. Thinking so made me feel calm. I could do things he would have killed me for, now that he couldn’t hurt me.

            The assembly was like nothing I had ever seen. Even in the ghetto, I had never seen so many Jews in one place. I was amazed by what I saw. These people were sick. Hungry. Thin. Tired weak angry grieving. But they had not given up. I could see it. They stood tall and proud and defiant. Even when they prayed they prayed together. The very weak supported by the slightly stronger. I had no doubt that if we tried to liquidate that night the ghetto’s prisoners would fight to the last man.

            So if I’m honest, it wasn’t for Gabe that I showed myself in the crowd. He was the reason I went to the assembly. But I made my decision because I wanted to stand with the people. I felt like one of them. A prisoner and a fighter. Ready to fight for my life. I could help them.

            Hersch looked as pleased as Berezovsky looked enraged when I stepped out of the shadows. “Listen!” Everyone else clutched each other and backed fearfully away from me. They had been arguing. No one could translate for me but I had heard my name thrown around. I could tell Peter had spoken against me and Rebecca had spoken on my behalf. I wished now I spoke more Polish. I could only try English and hope Hersch would translate. “Tell them I am Sturmmann Amery, and I am one of you.”

            I waited for Hersch to translate. Rebecca stood between Gabe and Jim now. Looking proud. Gabe caught my eye. He couldn’t keep the relieved smile off his face. I nodded at him and he looked so happy my heart hurt.

            The crowd did not warm to me. “Will you speak?” Hersch asked in English. I nodded and climbed the platform. I passed Berezovsky as I climbed the steps. He looked like he might punch me. I felt clammy as I faced the crowd. But I knew what to say. I had been turning it over in my head for days. I began haltingly, waiting in turns for Hersch to translate.

            “Herschel and my friends from the outside know I don’t use many words. I don’t claim to be a leader. Yes, I am a soldier. But I escaped from the Nazis once before, and only came back when I had no choice. I will keep my position inside the battalion so I can smuggle weapons, subvert the guards, and gather information. The revolution I leave to Herschel and Berezovsky.” I bristled, knowing that being civil towards Peter would help them trust me. “But I am telling you the truth: liquidation is coming. You should know that the soldiers are calling for reinforcements, additional troops,” an anxious rumble went up once Hersch translated that bit. But I knew what to say next. “But this is because they fear you! Their monstrous leader Dietrich fears your power more than anything in the world. He wants to destroy you because he knows that you have the strength to bring him down.” Hersch’s voice sounded constricted talking about Dietrich. But I felt more confident as the crowd began to respond in agreement. “He lives in fear of what you can do! And I say we show him that he was right to fear! We will show him that he can never crush the strength in this ghetto! I promise to fight him with you at every turn, if you put your trust in me. You will give him something to fear!”

            It was like everything I ever felt had poured out of me. I hadn’t known I could speak like that. It felt so good. Hersch had shouted the last phrase and now the crowd was repeating it. They were roaring. Rebecca had tears in her eyes, but she cried out with the rest of them. Even Peter stood roaring on the steps. Jesteśmy jego strach! We are his fear. I had done it. They believed me. If anyone disagreed I couldn’t hear them. Hersch gave me a look of approval more sincere than I had ever seen. I smiled at him. Something I did so rarely it felt unnatural on my face. Hersch patted my shoulder as I stepped off the platform.

            People still shrunk away from me as I made my way through the crowd. I couldn’t expect them to trust me entirely yet. I found Rebecca Jim and Gabe. Rebecca got to me first. She grabbed one of my hands in both of hers. “Thank you,” she said quietly. I thought she might hug me. But she just gave my hand a squeeze and dropped it.

            Jim seemed floored. “Unbelievable, Amery. Unbelievable.” He shook my hand like I was the goddamn president or something. I looked at Gabe. But he didn’t say anything. He didn’t have to. He just gazed at me with his bottom lip between his teeth. He looked at me like he used to. Like I was the center of the universe. And for once I didn’t care. I felt happy when he looked at me like that. Happy. At least at that moment I forgot how to push him away.

            “Herschel has to speak,” I heard Rebecca say over the roar of the crowd.

            “Why?” Jim asked loudly. “Listen to them! They’d follow Amery into battle right now!”

            Rebecca shook her head. “Nothing starts without Herschel. They are ready to fight, but they still want him to lead.” All four of us turned to look at him. He had stepped off the platform to say something to Peter. Hersch sensed our focus on him. He locked eyes with Rebecca. Gave her a small nod. She set her jaw and inhaled sharply. Ready for what he would say.

            The room went quiet as Hersch stepped back up. Peter stood beside him. Second in command. I wished for a second that we could stand up there with him too. But this was their moment. It was years in the making and had nothing to do with us. I took my place next to Gabe.

            “‘My friends,’” Hersch began in Polish. Rebecca translated to English for us. Her translation came so fast I quickly forgot that I didn’t understand Hersch. It was almost like she already knew what he would say. “‘I admit that I have failed you. For many years, I have failed you. Three years ago, I brought the revolution to its knees when I escaped to England. I put my life before the lives of my friends. My loss was no greater than any of yours, but I ran away, because I was weak.” His voice sounded constricted. I remembered that I had never seen Hersch cry.

            “‘I returned out of guilt. I believed I was meant to die in this place. I saw the world outside and thought there was nothing for me. Only more war and death.” The bombing. I shuddered and felt Gabe’s eyes on me. “But I felt unfit to lead you again. I believed if I tried to bring back the uprising I would only fail you again. Peter and Rebecca are so much stronger than I am. They’ve worked harder for the survival of this community than I ever have.’” He put a hand on Berezovsky’s shoulder. It was maybe the only smile I ever saw on Peter’s face.

            “‘I was weak, because I could not see a life outside these walls. My father and mother believed in the world away from the ghetto. The Resistance was born from the idea that we might find peace somewhere in the world.’” Now Rebecca was starting to well up. I hoped she could keep up the translation. “‘But that generation is nearly gone. Not only my parents, but your parents. I look around this room and I see young faces. We were children together when our parents began to teach us to fear the Nazis. We were barely adults when the Germans arrived in this country. We never left this city. And sometimes if feels like we were born into this war. We are the children of this war. We were born to fight. We have been fighting our whole lives.’” Voices in the crowd was beginning to cry out in agreement. He knew these people. He knew what to say.

            “‘My friends,’” he started again, “‘I am not my father. Rebecca is not our mother. Peter is not Yochanan Mencher and you are not the parents you have lost.’” I looked at Gabe. The same. An orphan. His lip was quivering. “‘We do not fight because we expect to win. Many of us will die. You know this. But we fight not to reach the outside, not to find a better world, but because we were born to fight! We know that it is better to die fighting for our lives than to die peacefully, not when nothing has ever been peaceful for us!’” Hersch was shouting again. Peter responded with a loud, “Tak!” Yes. I saw Jim squeezing Rebecca’s hand. My heart was pounding against my chest.

            “‘I am not my father, but I have something he did not. I have a lifetime of fighting, and so do each of you! When you’re born into war, you learn to fight to stay alive. Well we have made it this far my friends, and we will not stop fighting now! The Nazis do not know that they created us. We are the children of this war! We are the children of the storm they brought upon us! We are the Sons of Thunder!” He threw his fist into the air! “Insurekcja Mieszka!” The Resistance lives.

            The crowd exploded. I thought they liked my speech. But their response to Hersch was entirely more powerful. Screaming and crying. Fists in the air and arms outstretched. “Insurekcja Mieszka! Insurekcja Mieszka!” Rebecca’s voice was steady and proud. Despite the tears flowing down her face. She turned to Jim and threw her arms around his neck. He held a fold of her dress in his fist. Inhaled into her hair. Even here, she was more important to him than anything.

            Most everyone was shoving towards the front to be closer to Hersch. Peter was hanging off the railing and screaming. Hersch had jumped off the platform to joint the people. But the four of us stayed rooted in place. Trying to grasp the enormity of what he had done. I was in it now. We were in it. Nothing was the same anymore. I was a traitor. Hersch was a leader. Somehow, four stupid roommates from an English boarding school were going to help save these people. We were the Sons of Thunder. Born into the storm. We would lead a revolution.

            A hand brushed mine. My arm jerked. Automatic. No one ever touched me. I thought it was only someone in the crowd. But the hand stayed. I looked down. Saw Gabe slip his hand into mine. Small and light. It was my ruined hand. The scarring took most of the feeling out of my palm. So it felt strange to hold his hand. Like he was there but not there. He wove his delicate fingers between my damaged ones. Not afraid of their clawed stiffness.

            I didn’t take my hand away. I should have. I still didn’t want him to think I was ready to go back to him. I wasn’t. Yet. But I put my thumb over his and squeezed. I needed him there. I was afraid and uncertain and I needed him there. I didn’t think about what I was doing. All I knew was that his hand was soft and small and familiar and no one had touched me in so long.

            We didn’t say anything. Didn’t even look at each other. There was nothing we could have said that we didn’t say just by standing with his hand in mine. We were in this together. We were stronger together. I had always known I was better with Gabe. And standing in that room, I knew I would have to be better than I ever was before.

Reviews

[Bexfinch]

Awe this was really beautiful I love how you have developed these two characters. In interestingness they dwarf all of the other characters. Keep going with this story or move to a place where you will definitely get more viability like Wattpad. This site is quiet and reviews and views are often gotten through directly asking users, I think this is so awesome! The whole story everyone has come so far. I feel like Gabe has stopped being so shy and timid and Erich is slowly coming around the mountain though inherently he still is who he was. Ugh if you had visual accompany a site like Tumblr would eat this up. I remember i drew these two characters once for you and Im coming to my junior year at my art high school. There we have portfolio day and I would love to have some comic pages to show. So if you are interested message me and I'd love to work with you :)