the world lost a awesome man

today is black the sky is gray
it hurts right now but it will be okay

the world lost a man that was a soldier of him and the world
he fought threw all to stay alive and god called him home

he's looking at me now wondering why I am writing this but it makes sense
he touched everyone in his own special way today his body took over his mind and heart

so now I'm writing in rememerince of him and tring not to weep myself to sleep

Reviews

[Alessander]

I HATE pointing out typos in such pieces, but I must. It's "sense" not "sence" and "memrince" I don't think is a word. "In Memorium" (which I'm pretty sure I mispelled) would be much more appropriate - I would strongly recommend Tennyson's "In Memorium" - a long, emotive mourning of a beloved.

"Better to have loved and lost
Than not have loved at all"

Sorry for your loss.

[EMP]

This is such a sweet and effective poem. I'm sorry for your loss.
I think it would be even more perfect if the typos were sorted out but to be honest, they're irrelevant in such a powerful poem. also, I like how you've not used any capital letters... i think it emphasizes the sadness of the poem. good write, well done :)

[Havatara]

This is a sad, wonderful poem that has some distracting typos, but it's still good.

[Ashley Black]

very good write. very beautiful. sorry for your loss.

[Jessica]

I lost my grandfather not too long ago. I feel your pain. Great write, and I'm very sorry for your loss.

[Marlena]

I'm sorry for your loss...

But I have to agree with everyone else on this, there are a bunch of typos that you should fix, they take away from the poem.

[Chris]

Nice poem, and I'm very sorry for your loss. But...yeah. A bunch of typos and grammatical errors. I don't want to say something like that for a piece like this, but they are still there.

[AbsentElements]

I suggest reading it over a few times there are just a few spelling mistakes, including the title. "a awesome" should be "an awesome". Besides that it is very heartfelt...Poetry in my opinion is often the best way to express loss while at the same time honoring the person.... Very nice.

[San Herman Lopez a.k.a...]

I hope all is peace in your mind. This moments shared make us feel the humanity in a virtual world.

Thanks for sharing.

[TheAdventOf]

Oh wow... that's deep, and painful. I really like how you didn't try to be extravagant or anything with it, but kept it down to a bare-bones truth. Really gets the message across, and you did a wonderful job with this.