another incomplete poem

another incomplete poem

A Poem by H.Y
"

SO im practicing my writing. i really need more practice, I feel so noobish. lol, im such a nub nub

"

upon a night, beneeth the silver star
my world began to drift afar
i dreamt a dream and saw her face
her elogance and grace.
in the distance she gazed into my eyes,
and the world began to split into athousand skies.

© 2009 H.Y


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Reviews

This doesn't seem incomplete to me. It's a very sweet and endearing poem :]

Posted 15 Years Ago


this is so beautiful. your imagery and description is amazing. it doesnt really seem incomplete though. i love it.


Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Wow great start...really like the images your words form for me. The rhythm is great too.

Tigra

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

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H.Y
lol, im so lame i cant spell.

Posted 15 Years Ago


This is nice, I wonder what it would be like to see a thousand skies. Correct some of your errors...."beneeth" should be beneath. Also you need a space in between "a" and "thousand"

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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5 Reviews
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Added on April 18, 2009

Author

H.Y
H.Y

wausuau, WI



About
in a ploy to find myself, i find myself contemplating life. with a pen i write, i write the feelings i feel, i write the sites i see, i write to find myself, i write to write. I am essentially an a.. more..

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