Heart Full of Nails

A metaphorical onomatopoeia poem or how to drive your grammar/spell checker insane See: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Onomatopoeia

Heart Full of Nails

Lub-dub once went the heart

Ba boom and thump thump good and strong

Clackety-clack and clickety-clack went the train

Waank the horn thrilled out at intersections

However that was long ago

In a time and place now way behind

Jangle as the hammers drive the nails

Gr gr k k grk as each stabs deep

Ping, ding and boing as more strike

Bratatat and takka takka they come

Voomp and whaam as they plunge

Gurgle and fizz the engine oozes

Flick a flack fleck on broken glass

Glop, gurgle and pitter-patter it leaks

Splatter and splosh upon the ground

Chug and clank as it groans and moans

Croak, creak and caterwauling it brays

However it looks around in this trainyard

In this time and place it is not alone

Author's Note

Now just in case in no way correct the grammar or you might just go insane.

Reviews

[B]

lol
That poem made a sound lol

[H.L. Cerveise]

Thank you for reading and reviewing this writing. I hope I painted how a heart breaking and hurting sounds in a tongue-in-cheek manner. A writing that is both light and dark for one to ponder and smile at.

[B]

i guess so

[H.L. Cerveise]

In short I mean it is okay to smile and cry at the same time at something that happens in life.

[B]

I rather one or the other .... But I catch your drift

[Tony Jordan]

I like the 'wank-ing horn' - that translates here in the UK as something wayyy different than the authors intention (but perversely appropriate).
It must be hard to get through customs with such a heart - haha
Bravo !!

[H.L. Cerveise]

Thank you for reading and reviewing this writing.
Lol, there are a number of words in it that have double means and for sure when you consider urban usage of some of them. Some I did not know until I was researching the meanings of not just the sound words but normal combined ones in this piece.

[Tony Jordan]

Oh I love creating onomatopoeia - it engages the brain in such a creative way. You did very well imho.
You're welcome.

[H.L. Cerveise]

Oh, forgot its just not all the steel in my heart but the gold seeds inside me that could cause issues. :)

[Tony Jordan]

Gold...in your heart ...Now you're just taking the p*ss lol.
xD

[H.L. Cerveise]

Lol, not in my heart it is elsewhere. So at least when my time is done they can convert my ashes to a diamond and use the gold to make a necklace to attach it to.

[Tony Jordan]

Ahh - I see lol - Hey I wanted to get my dogs ashes made into one of those 'diamonds' but I didn't like the idea of having to keep cleaning poop off my neck

[Tony Jordan]

although to be fair, I have to clean my chin anyways cause people say i talk so much sh*t - lol

[Tony Jordan]

heyy - don't take so long to disagree - I have feelings you know *wink*

[H.L. Cerveise]

Hum, interesting never thought of it like that. You could always clone your dogs ($50,000 a piece); however, making a diamond would be cheaper. Still causes a problem still have to pick up the poop; however, I would rather have it on the ground instead of my neck.

[Tony Jordan]

D'you know - when I found out he had cancer I actually looked the cost of cloning up (in Korea or somewhere in southeast Asia but not only could I not afford it I knew that if I could, the dog would be a different personality and that would have been worse, in my eyes).
Yeah my poop-scooping days are over ...lol
Its great to meet you HL Cerveise.

[H.L. Cerveise]

We fellow dog lovers have to stick together. I had the same conversation about cloning a dog and to me and the other person who I was talking with it just felt that it would be creepy and not really the dog we knew. If you have not read my "In the Shadow of the Mountain" look it up I think you will like it.

[Tony Jordan]

Yeah the cloning thing would last visually for about a week then when the wee tyke's actual personality shone through and it wasn't like the dog that was cloned - sure it would be like losing them all over again.
I look forward to reading "In the Shadow of the Mountain" - thanks :)