Will I? Should I?

 As the image of his face appears in my head, I'm thinking. I can't stop thinking about him. How I'm incredibly scared and confused. How would he take it? How would I take it? As I look back at the image of him in my head, I then see a tear roll down his cheek. Then another one. Then some more. I squeeze my eyes shut as tight as they will go. Trying to get that miserable image out of my head. I feel my chest. Through my chest, I feel my heart. I feel it as it starts to tare. I feel a tear come down my cheek. Then another one. Then some more. I think back to all of the times we shared together. I think to myself if they had all gone to waste. Will I end it? Should I end it? An endless list of questions run through my head, down to my heart, and all throughout my shaking body of aching pain. I remember that time in my life, when I just kept telling myself that he is the one I want to be with forever. When I told myself that I am the one for him, he is the one for me. Now, sadly, I'm thinking different. Different thoughts are running through my head. Agonizing thoughts, that make my body and heart ache even more then they ever have before. I keep asking myself if I'm going to be strong enough to do this. To maybe, possibly end the unimaginable relation ship I have with the love I thought would never end. No. Yes? I don't know. I can't help but cry as these thoughts are traveling through my jumbled heart. I don't want them to end. I really don't want them ever to end. I love him, I tell my self. Everyday I tell myself that I love him. That I can't live without him. But the question is, is it really true? Could I live without him? Could I go on with my life without the one I thought I'd be with for the rest of my life not in my arms? Yes. I think positive about this thought. I surprise myself. I think, yes I do love him. But there are going to be so many others who are willing to love me and care for me just as much as he does. Will I end it? Will I end it? Should I end it? Again, these horrifying questions run through my head. The only thing is, I'm not sure about any of them.