PERCEPTIONS

This is all about how people misjudge someone's attitude and that too when they meet someone for the first time

PERCEPTIONZ

Well, it all happened two years ago, when my friend Geethik told me about a criminal lawyer cum psychologist. The college management requested her to spare her valuable time in molding the attitudes of students in his college through a medium called ‘Pre-Placement Training' just for 20 days. This fellow, my friend, was so impressed with her style of interaction with the students and the charm she possessed. Mostly he used superlatives from the language English to describe her way of interaction. He told me that she was spot on in analyzing a person's attitude in a jiffy. He even told her about me that I am so crazy and can easily mingle with anyone. Then he wanted me to meet her and told me not to miss her at any cost. Then, I dint give it a second thought since I was already partially convinced and agreed to meet her on the weekend...

                   On the following Sunday morning, since my friend knows I am a lazy person, he visited my home just to wake me up and to finish a small errand on the way. I was sleepy and was thinking whether to meet her or to give it a miss... I even told him that I can’t make it as I wanted to sleep. Then again, the superlatives which he used were echoing in my mind and then I thought OK, let’s meet her and just know how psychologists analyze people. So finally, I have decided to meet her along with my friend, thanks to my curiosity! I wasn't too excited and my dressing clearly showed that I wasn't very keen to meet her. I myself and my friend set out to meet her at the cute Cafe Coffee Day whose tagline read ' A lot can happen over a coffee '. On the way to the CCD, he told me that she can scan a person's attitude just by analyzing that particular person's signature. I still remember the wordings he used to describe her analyzing ability - He said "Dude, she is such a kind of person who doesn't see you, but she sees through you". All his admiration about her made the event evenly poised.... We reached CCD and were waiting for her to arrive. In the meanwhile, we were discussing our schedules and somehow, the topic got diverted towards her and Geethik again told me that she can analyze a person's attitude by looking at his signature. He then took out a diary and made a list of psychological things on which he needed clarity. He then asked me to put my signature. I did the same and he wanted me to do it for one more time. I did it again. He then said, both of them were almost congruent. (Maybe he wanted to check the congruency of my signature). After some time, he got a call from the much awaited person stating that she is in front of CCD, so that means she has finally arrived...

                   I decided to hold back my inside out character of a fun loving, irritating and humorous Hima and disguised into a calm, compact and analytical person. She introduced herself. Her name is Piaa. The way she came forward in taking the initiative to introduce herself was symbolizing that she is an expressive person. We then went inside the CCD, occupied a table and ordered our respective, and the actual fun started...

                   She asked me what all did Geethik tell me about her. I was supposed to tell " ma'am, you were the reason in helping him out of his depression" but I dint add the words "helping him out" and the sentence I spoke was “ma’am, you were the reason for his depression" and she was quickly onto it and was surprised for being the reason behind my friend's depression. Then I clarified that she was very helpful in bringing him out of depression and the whole thing got settled. She then asked me what all do I knew about him in our friendship of two and a half years. I willingly replied "I knew nothing about him". This sentence of mine took both of them by surprise and I witnessed a weird funny expression on my pal's face. (It was worth a peek).  Then she asked me my educational status and we all had a gentle sip of our respective coffees...

                    Geethik then took out a paper which had the signatures of his father, mother and his sister. He wanted her to analyze the mentality of his family members based on their autographs. First to go through her scan was the signature of his father. She told a few of the features of his father and I was relating them to his father as far as I know about him and was checking whether they were synchronizing with his mentality or not. Then, Geethik asked her about his father's temper, to which she thought for a second and said "your father has got a fly off temper". Here, I noticed a point and guessed that she dint even have the idea of his father's temper but, since Geethik put forth the feature - Temper of his father, it made her job easier in guessing that his father has got a fly off temper. Generally, people bring a person's feature forward when it really is exhibited by that particular person. So I wasn't impressed because even I was able to guess when he pointed out Temper in particular. The answer was however, an obviYES!!

                   Next was the turn of Geethik's mother's signature. By looking at the signature, Piaa ma'am said that "Geethik, your mom was an ambitious lady before marriage and she shut all her dreams and compromised herself and bound herself to the family". Again, I dint find a reasonable edge in her answer because when a person like Geethik's father is so short tempered and dominant in a family, then surely, there has to be a receptor (here Geethik's mother)who goes on receiving any kind of radiations and equates them by compromising at every situation. So I mean - To compensate the source of temper (his father), his mother (as recipient) has no other way but to compromise. So, I thought this was the foggy witness which made her (Piaa ma'am) to guess the mentality of Geethik's mom. The practical idea is so simple to analyze than to prove it theoretically on paper. She now turned to Geethik's sister. Since I have very less idea about his sis, I dint crosscheck any of the features which Piaa ma'am analyzed about her... Finally, It was my own signature's turn to undergo her scrutiny...

                  

By looking at my signature, she quickly said “You are 'ENTANGLED' to your family. I & Geethik were literally shocked with the term she used - Entangled! And she immediately said that I don’t take any decisions on my own. I was not convinced a bit with her first analytical result. I told her she was wrong because, for me, my family is my strength as they give me enough room of comfort, mental strength and wings of freedom. Entangled is a much heavier word to use because it means when you are entangled with someone or in a situation, you are stuck with them and find it difficult to escape from that situation. So how can I feel entangled to my parents who are of great support to me was my question. Even Geethik agrees with me that my family is my strength. She then quickly refracted her sentence and said “You are not entangled to your family, but you give utmost importance to your family. Whatever the situation is, you keep your family at the center i.e. you are bound to your family". Well, can you name anyone who doesn't give priority to his family????.  99% of people give priority to their respective families and it’s in their blood and genes. So I thought anyone can guess it. Coming to the next result that I don't take decisions or she was like I am poor in decision making, I thought she just went on building on her perception that when my family is my support and they are like a center for me, then I leave any decision to my parents etc, which spares me from making any decision. I have to say she has a swift follow-through of psychological trusses of a general brain. So decision making assertion was completely ruled out in my view.

                   She told that I am an inquisitive person and I like to question each and every theory to prove. She told I believe in facts rather than just theories. Meanwhile, I was just rethinking about her previous assertion that I am entangled and I don't take decisions. I drew a still thinking expression on my face and that made her to conclude that I am confused by the nature of my body language and my facial expression. (I already said you she has got a fictitious imagination). The funniest moment was when I was tapping my feet to the music which was being played inside CCD and she again misread it that I am feeling uncomfortable and was feeling very tensed. I really wanted to laugh out loud, but I thought it would degrade my silent outlook. This perception was a result of excess analysis of simple things. How funny it was - I was just tapping my feet to the music and she thought it was an indication of my tension!! We then had another sip of our respective chilled coffees...

                   She then asked us for how long we both (Me and Geethik) have been friends. To this, Geethik answered “about two & half years ".  She then asked us that are we both 'BEST FRIENDS’?? To this, Geethik replied “YES" and I said "NO". (Now Geethik's facial expression was worth a watch when I said NO). I added that I don't have any 'BEST' friends. So now with that sentence she finally guessed one quality of mine that I don't trust people. She guessed it correct because of the vivid opposite answers (YES & NO) given by us. But, even then I was not totally convinced because I had given her a clue that I don't have any best friends. Generally, a person trusts a person who is very close to him. But since I had given her the clue of not having best friends, it made her to guess correctly that I don't trust people. She said that I built a wall around myself so that no one can step into my territory and that is why I don’t have any best friends (I felt she was able to say this basing my clue that I don’t trust anyone). I had many questions which were to be answered but I wasn't ready for an argument that too with a person whom I met for the first time. So I thought it would be better if I sit back and have all the fun while she was still feeling that she made me feel uncomfortable. At this point, I felt I mastered a trick of illusioning people with a weapon called SILENCE. I bet SILENCE is the best way to confuse even a Dexter.

                   Then everything seemed to be normal and we were ready to visit the historic CHARMINAR. While leaving, Geethik asked me if everything was OK and was ready to return home if anything was wrong. I then felt his emotional comedy and told him that everything was fine and ready to visit CHARMINAR and need not have to worry about me keeping my silence in mind. On the way to Charminar, I explained him the reason behind my silence was just a test, then he was like "Idiot, you were playing with us till now??". We had a laugh and were enjoying the ride and we reached Charminar - The landmark of Hyderabad...

                  

Present day, we have special courses and degree for civil engineering and architecture but, after looking at the craft-work of Charminar, I was lost in its ancient craft. By looking at those designs, I could surely say that the people of ancient era had stupendous skill and determination rather than degrees or designations. I think the line 'Crafted to Perfection' was evolved from this monument...

I was clicking pics of the designs and was even more silent as I was enjoying the place. Then, Geethik came to me and said “Dude, Piaa ma'am is feeling uncomfortable because she thinks you are not feeling comfortable and she feels she is the person responsible for that ". I was exhausted by this same question being asked again and again... But guess what, till then, both Geethik and Piaa ma'am were feeling uncomfortable because they felt I was uncomfortable. Wow, it was my silence which made them both feel uncomfortable... Then we had a visit to Birla mandir and as the day descended, we had a goodbye shake hand and all were on our way back to our respective sweet homes.

                   Finally a tipsy-twisty-turvy-turnaround of things on a single day made it a very different fun filled weekend... Surely, A LOT CAN HAPPEN OVER A COFFEE...

DROWEROF

After reading this, most of the people do think that I was set out to prove her analysis wrong. But I actually, was trying to convey how people perceive things and estimate opposite people’s attitude wrongly based on some illusory proofs.

Every human being has a unique perception of things, situations and of course people… Perception of a person is his way of just glancing at things or people. We can’t judge or guess a person or his attitude by a simple perception under standard conditions. Sometimes, they are illusions... or it’s like, they seem to be a conclusion, when they are actually not. And I believe most of us are so impulsive in deciding a person's attitude depending upon his way of talking, sitting posture, facial expressions and what all parameters that fall under misty witnesses to perceive about that particular person and that too when we meet him for the first time...

                   I bet a person isn't the same under standard conditions and in the crunch situations. Even a cool person is not the same in two congruent situations, but at different times... It’s the natural aura of character and presence of mind that takes a person through tough terrain situations in this journey called life...

                   So I feel a person's attitude can't be estimated or perceived on temporary parameters. I don't command you not to perceive a person but you have to realize that these misty axes are just your points of view and not a conclusion about a particular person.

They say

                 “NEVER  JUDGE  A  BOOK  BY  ITS  COVER”

Even then, 

             WE  JUDGE  A  PERSON’S  ATTITUDE  BASED  ON  SOME BASELESS  ILLUSORY  PROOFS

Those illusory proofs are nothing but our

PERCEPTIONS 

    By  

 V.S.HIMAVANTH

Author's Note

It is my gratitude to have your suggestions so that I can improve myself