Will I find myself?

A poem about looking at other's and comparing them to yourself. Sometimes it can be hard to fit in and feel okay in this world.

I stared at all those around me

Smiling faces and white teeth

And took one look at myself

Will I find myself?

 

I tried and tried again

Tried to find that inner peace

Tried to find that self-love

And ended up disappointed

 

Graceful movements right and left

A subtle sway of hips

The rhythmic pulse of music

I stayed hidden in the shadows

 

I plastered on that smile

The one that dazzled the world

While inside I was crumbling

Wondering where I went wrong

 

  The days go by in a blur

One after the other

Something sticks out with each one

Am I finding myself?

 

I let myself give in

All the sadness and grief

I forget about empathy, about pity

Everything is dark

 

 The next day the sun is there

A big brighter than before

Inside I am not me

I am a shell of the other woman

 

A passerby stops to stare

Watching as I welcome the sunshine

They begin to welcome it too

My heart begins to warm

 

  I am remembering each day

I am appreciating mother nature

My soul still has a dull ache

Have I found myself?

 

The hardest realization is upon me

Do I accept my fate?

Do I try and change it?

The choice is obvious

 

All the pain and sorrow flow out

My body feels awakened

My lips curl up in an unfamiliar fashion

I laugh with the passerby on the street

 

My pulse begins to quicken

The heavens begin to open

My soul begins to widen

My thoughts are becoming clear

 

Acceptance is only part of myself

Desire is what comes next

I focus on happiness

The ache begins to fade

 

Arms open, I let it pour down

I let myself feel the pain

I let myself feel the ecstasy

I think it’s making sense

 

I cannot control the world

I cannot control the pain

I can envelop in the joy

I can become what I envisioned

 

The world is a forbidding place

But I have overcome much worse

I am a warrior

I have found myself

Author's Note

Probably some grammar issues. This poem is a result of never feeling like I quite belong, and what it takes to accept who you are.

Reviews

[...]

Ilike form of poem. I find it more empty space in between. Allow to words more breathing frely in between each other. Yes pain can pour through us but we can streaming joy from our hearts. cery nice and beautiful.

[Matthew Kult]

Darkly Traveling, Shyful revival

Lovely Read

Matthew

[poetryloverr44]

Thank you Matthew!

[Matthew Kult]

You are welcome

Matthew