The Wildflower and the Bee

The wildflower opened itself

That the bee might find its soul

Long and deep drank he of her nectar sweet

Dilligently sucking out the essence of her core

The wildflower trembled, submitting

As he satiated his thirsty hunger

And trembled as he left

She sighed, once more alone

He had his fill and like the rest

Flew on in search of sweeter flowers

He spewed honey in his chamber

As she withered by the hour

He didn't even remember her

Reviews

[Dinesh Sairam]

I've tried a rough metric correction. Take it if you like:

The wildflower opened itself
That the bee might find its soul
Long and deep he drank nectar
Sucking out from the sweet-core
The wildflower trembled, submitting
Satiated his hunger,
And she trembled as he left.

Then she once more sighed alone
With his fill, he, like the rest,
Flew searching sweeter flowers.
He spewed honey in his chamber,
As she withered by the hour.
(He, her, never remembered).

And perhaps, the rhymes could be improvised too. But I absolutely enjoyed the meaning, and the imagery. It's always good to use Nature as the veil, the metaphor. Allows wording and imagery with ease. Well, at least for me, and you. Keep writing.

[Greg Skura]

Nice! I love the longing slowly building in this piece!

[Sweet & Tender Hooligan]

A interesting perspective on love from the imagery of flowers and bees. A wonderful read and a imaginative piece.

[Robin]

a imaginative look from the hearts perspective ...

[Lilly Negoi]

how often do we joke about "bees and flowers"? :) yet again how often this imagery fits our reality? :) if only the aftermath in our reality would be just as sweet as the honey in your metaphor :)...