The Burning Dragon Dwells In My Suffocating Flames

The dragon that dwells beneath my soul is angry.

The fire that I had lit in my heart is suffocating, dying.

It is too hot to touch, and too far gone to save, yet I let myself try resulting in the burning of my flesh.

The smell of the ashes fills my nose.

The sparks that used to be so abundant, they were no longer found.

The beautiful amber color the flames used to create turned into a dark gray, almost numb, but still alive.

The smoke makes it hard to see and think clearly.

The poisonous air gets into my lungs and it is hard to breathe.

The dragon told me not to get lost in the forest, he told me not to wander endlessly, hopelessly.

He warned me that I was walking in to a trap.

I walked straight into a knife.

It was not until the tip of the blade reveled itself through my back, that I realized how much I was bleeding.

I saw the flames dying, perishing, as I stumbled out of the woods covered in my own blood.

Reviews

[Tazz S.H.]

WHOA girl o_o
That was.....deep. And...wow. You should make this into a monologue for some sort of story...I'd so read it :]
I always enjoy reading something from the HighSchoolAdventurer.
I especially loved the lines: "The beautiful amber color the flames used to create turned into a dark gray, almost numb, but still alive.
The smoke makes it hard to see and think clearly." and "He warned me that I was walking in to a trap.
I walked straight into a knife.
It was not until the tip of the blade reveled itself through my back, that I realized how much I was bleeding.
I saw the flames dying, perishing, as I stumbled out of the woods covered in my own blood." WELL DONE ;D

[Vertigoingnowhere]

thank you!

[Coyote Poetry]

A very strong poem. I like the use of the dragon. Anger can lead us to bad places. I like the ending to the outstanding poem.
Coyote

[Vertigoingnowhere]

thank you oh kind coyote

[Calibaster]

After try there should be a comma. in to- put them together, into. REVEALED itself through my back, spelling alert. Very good imagery! I enjoyed it thouroughly and look forward to reading the next one.

[quinfinn]

your use of imagery and the intense metaphorical contrivances are astounding in this absolutely brilliant write. it isn't often i read a new poem/prose and find myself wishing i had thought of it and wanting to see more...you have reached a new plateau in your writing, amd i am proud and pleased to see you "arriving"! outstanding!

[Vertigoingnowhere]

rreeaallyy??!!

[eatmills]

You haven't failed to show the growth in your writing. The symbolism of the Dragon, the knife, the fire; just awesome! I am not goo do your edit but you do need to do a quick reread and fix a few spots. Good on ya Hannah.

[Vertigoingnowhere]

Thank you!
-High School