Just an aftertaste....................

You stopped me at the first hello, an

 

older and charming handsome fellow

 

we quickly went from friends to lovers

 

I began to slaver for something more

 

I wanted to extinguish you, tasting

 

your salty skin, igniting a craving within

 

I need more to satisfy this palate, your

 

smell of blood sweet like punch, so I

 

pursue my first innocent lick and bite

 

only to get you stuck between my teeth

 

breaking fingers and splintering bones

 

I try to savor your affection in my mouth, but

 

what was once a confection has turned bitter

 

instead I had to swallow you down whole

 

bloated now from the weight of your soul.

Author's Note

Reviews

[MoriartyMesa]

Well slap my a*s call me Charlie and tell me to see Wonka bars. The start gave me the impression the end would not be as harsh. But I loved it, the entire flow could have been someone's thoughts when lying in bed and having the ever important moment of clarity.

[Arthur Henn]

If I'm not far off... I think when reading this. I think of age differences when it comes to real love... Does age make a difference...

[A Soap Mess Stories]

All-consuming words...great job!

[Larry Dyson]

I like the flow of this"I had to swallow you down whole



bloated now from the weight of your soul."..good analogy..

[Luke Ritta]

very good......great descripted poem

[Enigma]

Amazing. And extremely intense, throughout. Flowed smooth, yet with a rapid face. Well penned. :)

[SpokenWord]

I see different things in this write to me and maybe only me. First the title I have to say I would hate to be just an after taste too anyone, lol wow that doesn't sound good. Most times when someone mentions an aftertaste it has a negative memory of the experience of consuming something. Many relationships move to quickly from the friend stage into the more sexual part and usually one does to desire more over the other. Though in this poem to me she decided to consume him whole unable to control her own passions but in doing so I don't think he tasted as good to her as if she had slowly taken her time. Or maybe it was his taste that made her consume him just to get past the the bitter taste that she thought would be sweet. How ever it is the ending that I really like carrying the weight of ones soul, nicely done to me it shows remorse or maybe regret. Excellent write~~ You're pretty good with this poetry stuff.

[Eagle Cruagh]

Toying with the aftertaste. What an
unusual approach to romance, adventure
and the soul.
What always gets in the path of love,
becoming possessive, consuming the lover.
That will usually bring about the wrong conclusion.
Very well written, very unusual and yes, exciting.

Thank you,
------Eagle Cruagh

[R J Askew]

Marvellous, very strong. The desire to consume, to possess, is both compelling in its potency and terrifying. Can we control such feelings within us? Can we control such feelings in others? Do we want to control them? Or do we want to be consumed by them.

[Kenneth The Poet]

Still a haunting, beautiful write, Muse.

[Dayran]

Probably just needs the right wine. The report of an accuracy unsurpassed in gender relations. Great write!