I don't want to die living in a high-rise grave

Yes! Its true. I got the inspiration by a song by Metric.

The water was so high over my head I couldn't catch my breath

I don't wanna die living in a pool made of your lies

The plastic bag pulled so tight that my vision was red

I don't wanna die living in a bag of your insecurities

The morphine so deep in my veins I can't see straight

I don't wanna die being the drug you abuse.

 

Reviews

[typicallyunsure]

Its short but the emotion is intense. I really love the image of drowning and how it is used to present the overwhelming feeling of anxiety and doubt (that's what I got from it anyway). Really great dark poem.

[tynamite]

The creativity here is amazing.

[roy mccarthy]

i love this,
you are very talented,
last line was titanic,
a beast of a poem :)

[Coyote Poetry]

This is poetry. Remind me of a Leonard Cohen. His song "fingerprints" told of love leaving little sweetness. No weakness in this poem. Just honest and direct words. Complete poem I enjoyed. Thank you for a outstanding poem.
Coyote

[FemmeSpookyCorpse]

I really liked this! Your descriptions are very vivid and raw! Only, I had to re-read the last line a few times to understand it. I'm not sure if you believe it would fit or not, but I had a suggestion for the last line. You could write (if you wanted to) "I don't wanna die being the drug you abuse." This is a great piece and I think it flows wonderfully...great job = ]

[Just Cat]

Wow... a strong piece! Love the very powerful metaphors and imagery.
Great work
:)

[Jupiter Jazz]

You have a great use of metaphors that you explain so theirs no doubt to what you meant and how you felt. Great job! Yosh!!

[Tasha]

Wow, this was amazing and sad at the same time. I loved how you used different colors. This was great, keep on writing.
♥ Ta'Shandra