my only two sentences

I wish you would treat me better

I would've want you in my life

I almost loved you, its a good thing I didn't

the only feeling you have was pure hatred

you treated my family like crap

you never cared about my illness or fever

I will make you pay for the things you done to me

alll you want to do is ruin our family and be a jerk

my heart is better without you, it will always be

never in my life will I call you "father" 

 

Author's Note

I know that this is a short poem, but I tried my best to come up with a poem. This is a poem for a jerk (cough) *sshole '(cough) that lived in my life 6 years ago.
Any reviews?

Reviews

[kublakhan27]

My dad had the same issue with HIS dad (I don't think he saw or heard tell of him past age six) so I totally understand where you're coming from here...he was a stronger person because of it though...and I'm sure it will have the same effect on you though you're already a great writer so it probably already has :) 100^^

[∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿]

Thanks ^_^

[kublakhan27]

No problem :)

[Rika]

Yeap he,s a jerk, nice flow of emotions, loved it!-- your teady bear

[The dark story]

ammmmm.i've never read a poem like this before."i mean the theme".it is serious;y painful that someone who is bestowed with a great title should be treating his own kind in such a rotten way..........anyway.i liked this poem a lot.and the way you wrote it touched my heart..and the title is too nice ......highlighting out that two sentences in the midst of your poem.it is a really very appreciable work!!!!!!!!!!!!

[∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿]

Thanks.

[Gina]

WOW LOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE IT.

[Silent Knight]

Very strong feelings are portrayed. Interesting use of font sizes as well. Good job.

[∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿]

Thanks ^-^

[Sourav]

Very interesting style of writing Two lines. Like it.

[∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿]

I'm glad you liked it ^_^

[♋ Iris ♋]

I love this poem. Relatable sad and just purely awesome.

[∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿]

Thank you ^.^

[dreaming dame]

Yes, well said. Love the ttwo sentances. Though this is def. not a happy poem. But so well written:)

[∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿]

Well, I'm not used to happy poems because mostly its more about sadness... Thank you :)

[Isobella Rose]

First off, this poem is great. To me, one short poem that's really good is better than a really long poem that isn't as good. I especially like how you made some words bigger to form another sentence. I am sorry about your dad, by the way. I don't mean to sound creepy (sorry if I do) but if you ever want to talk, message me. I like to help people :)

[∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿]

Hmm... So your saying that I should add more to the poem :/ I don't really understand (I'm mostly confused :P)
I already have a lot of people who are helping me with this problem, thanks anyway ^_^
Btw, thanks for reading :)

[Isobella Rose]

No! I was saying that it was good the way it is! Sorry if I made you confused :(

[Isobella Rose]

I meant that a great short poem (like this one) is better than a long poem that isn't as good

[∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿]

Oh, Okay thanks ^_^

[Bluefire]

Sadly I know how you feel

[∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿]

A lot of people can relate this.
Btw thanks for reading.

[Bluefire]

No problem. Its a good read, great job.

[Amanda J. S.]

I am sorry! I haven't felt like this myself, but my mother has, so I know how it can affect people. If you wanna talk, message me :-) I love to help people!

[∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿]

Thanks for reading ^_^
I'll message you when I have a problem :)