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Sisters

Sisters

A Story by Crowley

     The handsome man sat between the two sisters at the bar. He was wiry, muscled like freighters usually were, all that lifting and moving. He drank a beer and listened to the sisters talk of pineapple candy and licorice whips, giggling and fingering their hair and necklaces without knowing  they was doin' it. The sisters were named Trepidation and Sanguination.  The handsome man, the wiry man, thought that those were right odd names for girls such as these, but then thought, what business was it of his to second guess the naming. It was a mother's right to name her children whatever she wanted and here he was smack sandwiched between the two, feelin' a bit like a rooster, struttin' and eyeing his spoils with a one eyed intensity, head cocked, senses sure and alert.

 

     Another man approached the bar and ordered a whiskey.  This man was mountainous and the smell that came off of him was sour and festering. His hands were rough and dirty, his face the color of old pavement. His eyes too thin and watery.The wiry man, the handsome man, knew that men like this had no good in em' and were used to taking to what they wanted. His grandpa once told him that men like that didn't come from the land, weren't part of the land.  That they viewed theyselves separately from all that was natural, all that was the land. They took what they wanted, and wanted not the thought of other men and was niggardly with the things they took, not sparing a single thought to the feelings or the worry of another soul.

     

     The man drank his whiskey and turned toward them.

 

     "Ladies," he said tipping his glass and a jowly smile at the sisters.

  

     The sisters were silent.

 

     "What's the matter girls, cat got your tongue?"

 

     Silence.

     

     "Can't ya tell when a real man is courtin' ya, or are you just some stuck up c**t's in need of a good roll?"

    

      He slammed his glass back on the bar and ordered another.

 

     "Maybe they just know when the meat's done spoiled,"  the handsome man, the wiry man, said.

     

     The big man glared, his too red, too watery eyes fixed on the wiry man, the handsome man.

    

     "You making' to get at me," the big man said in a low, even voice.

 

     "No sir, I just reckon we want to be left to ourselves if it ain't so much to ya."

 

     The big man walked toward the little group and stood towering above the handsome man, the wiry man. His stench wasn't so much real, like salt pork gone bad, but more like the smell of death and decay, the smell of trouble in a back alley dice game gone to fightin'.

 

     He reached and grabbed the wiry man, the handsome man, by the collar.

 

     "Bet you didn't think that today was the day you died, he said taking his other monstrous hand and now encircling both hands around the neck of the handsome man, the wiry man. He started to squeeze.

 

     "Hey," the shout came from the sister called Trepidation.  The big man looked up for a split second just in time for him to see the flashing arc of the knife as Sanguination cut his throat, the blood gushing immediately in pulsing arcs on to the shirt and face of the wiry man, the handsome man.

 

     A honk came from outside the bar.  The sisters threw two half dollars on the bar and grabbed the wiry man, the handsome man, by the arms and pulled him along out the front door.

 

     Pulled to front of the bar was a silver Lincoln. Behind the wheel sat another woman. She had yellow hair and sunglasses. The sisters pushed the handsome man, the wiry man, into the back seat and hurriedly got in, slamming the doors.


     "Well what do we have here," the woman behind the wheel asked as she slammed the gas pedal to the floor board. Gravel  dust and blue smoke rolled out from the back of the car. "Looks you done caught yourselves a man," she said looking in the rear view glass at the sisters.

 

     She held her outstretched hand over the seat to shake. 

 

     "I'm Satiation, what say we take you back to our place and get you cleaned up," she said not taking her eyes from the road.

 

     The handsome man, the wiry man, smiled.

 

© 2019 Crowley


Author's Note

Crowley
Too much Cormac Mcarthy and Steinbeck lately....jus' ain't right I reckon.

My Review

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Reviews

Documentation
1/27/2020
4:47 PM U.S.A. MST
This review content authored by PB Jacobs.
My review content of "Sisters," by Crowley.

Dude

Your intro and setting content rambles on. You're a matter-of-fact, kind of who cares type, if you ask me.

Neato! You write with imagination, and you are not afraid to mince dialogue and cultures. Cool

Gotta love the swear words. Awesome...

I'd use the words stupid Little b***h, just to make them official. It goes with your dialogue.

Way to express enthusiasm and artistry.

Dare you kubler an and, as in sand...

Author a speech impediment in, maybe...

PB Jacobs

Posted 4 Years Ago


I love how you depict thoroughly detestable characters in a way that feels like you're making fun & inviting the reader to join in the fun. The first two paragraphs are brilliantly written ways to show these characters in all their glory. I love your naming conventions, as well as the ensuing discussion of it. There's just so much to love here! Not least of which would be spitting gravel to escape the carnage! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

Posted 4 Years Ago


Such a rollicking write, Crowley. Start to finish, my eyebrows were up to my scalp, my thoughts loaded with mini queries as to how it might finish. You certainly know how to spin a story, get your readers guessing, make visual your characters... plus, end up with a four-sided figure of fun and games!!

Name choice, first class, by the way.

Posted 5 Years Ago


Crowley

5 Years Ago

Lol... thanks Emma!!! I had fun writing it. Hope you are well!!!!
Let us trust that satiation won out over trepidation. and that sanquination got a fair share of the spoils. :))

Left field enough to be really fun to read.

Beccy.

Posted 5 Years Ago


Crowley

5 Years Ago

Temptress, to much sophistication for the other.
This comment has been deleted by the poster.
Beccy

5 Years Ago

Bit of both; like most of our kind. Luckily for you I'm out of bullets. :))
Ah, so this IS what happens on those one too many nights i couldnt remember from my youth, when i woke with no memory, yet felt i had been through 12 rounds with Mike Tyson. So glad i dont drink these days. 😀
I like this one my friend. Just enough spookiness for this time of year, a little wishing and hoping the three on one gets kinky and most of all, a warning unheeded that talking to strangers will get you in trouble. A little like Hans Christian Abdersen on absinthe 😀

Posted 5 Years Ago


Crowley

5 Years Ago

Ha!!! I love that last line of the review, awesome, thanks my friend!!!
Oh how many times i got black eyes for being that poor b*****d that called on the smelly one LOL! my outcome never ended up so nicely that I can recall but then again back in those days I can recall very little in my stewed state:) I loved the story and even more so loved the ending and wish I was that lucky fellow:)

Posted 5 Years Ago


Crowley

5 Years Ago

Lol....me too. Thanks BB a little fluff to try and get back on the right track. A right purdy review.. read more
Influences aside, I think I see what you're going for, and declare it a success. Could see it all play out and tried not to smell the mountain man. Seems it was handsome man, wiry man's day to get lucky.

Posted 5 Years Ago


Crowley

5 Years Ago

Indeed, but you know girls like the are nothing but trouble in the end. All I got to say is bring em.. read more

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7 Reviews
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Added on October 26, 2019
Last Updated on October 28, 2019

Author

Crowley
Crowley

Phoenix, AZ



About
Like to hang out with other writers and see what's what. Have met a lot of good people on this and other sites through the years. Decided to come back and do a little posting and reading. Hit me up i.. more..

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