Pick Up Artists.

She sucked up his words like a Black Hole swallowing stars. Her face glowed in the shimmer of his voice. And his words were luminous, languid, they flowed through language like fireflies drunk on their own light. She too was drunk, gargling down his whispers and laughing gaily at his eloquent but unfunny remarks. Her squawking seemed vulgar in comparison.

But all the same she was beautiful, so deceptively beautiful, and yet she was as hollow as a porcelain doll.

As the night began to slowly shuffle into the morning light, he performed his final act. With all his charms and illusions he commanded the glamour of the night, and in a light-second the porcelain girl - disappeared.

 Perhaps, this would of been impressive, 

if she had been all there to begin with.   

Author's Note

reviews are great! Is that a hint ? I think so. :)

Reviews

[Eagle Cruagh]

I agree, reviews are agreat, but I suck at reviews.
I would much prefer to talk about the beautiful girl,
dripping desire, who was hollow as a porcelain doll.
Who sucked up the miscellaneous guys words like
a black hole sucking stars. Dammmm ! Wish I coold
think up incredible phrases like that. You got a piece
of heaven on your tongue, lady. Cherish and nourish it.
----- Eagle Cruagh

[herohappenings]

aw, you're too kind :)

[TLK]

Word missing in first sentence.

I feel the title directs me to the male PUA, but the poem is actually about the 'hollow doll' female. I wonder what universe this is where PUAs are charming rather than creepy, and whether I should be taking something away in terms of judging a man who spends his time flattering hollow women.

[herohappenings]

Thanks! This previously wasn't titled but I thought it would be fun to see if the title "Pick Up Artists" would change the effect of the writing. To me both of my characters are "hollow". The male is a wordsmith whose words are eloquently chosen but are of little substance. All he values is the sparkle of his words, even if what he says is dishonest or meaningless. The female is beautiful, glowing even, but she sucks in his hollow words like a vacuum because she is also vacuous. The charm of this pick up artist is just an illusion - whether he is creepy or not is up for you to decide.