A Busy Morning

Rin woke up  early on a Monday morning to fussing and the sound of people running around, he yawned and ran his hands though his hair, he could never get a break in this  house hold. He soon got up and brushed his teeth  and brushed his brown hair, then he changed out of his pj's and threw on a green shirt and his favorite brown jacket with his brown jeans, usually he would  wear black jeans but today he deiced to make a change. Rin was about to step out side but his two spirits, Kasumi and Katio floated above him with huge smiles.

 

"Good morning Rin," ,they both said together .

 

Rin spirits were both twins, they both looked human except for their cat ears,tails,fangs and glowing yellow eyes, okay I take that back their nothing human  like about these two, the thing with these two is their ability is the element fire and they love to play pranks around the house like their about to now just watch.

 

"Good morning,Kasumi and Kaito", I said as i reached for the door and a huge bucket of freezing water came down on me. As the water poured on  me my face went red, after the waterfall of water stop, I turned around fast started to slap the air looking dumb as my bed room door opened.

 

"Rin why are you soak and wet", questioned his brother Kumari as he raised an eye brow, "any ways mom said harry up and come down stairs so you came eat your breakfast and clean the shrine",he said as he turned to leave.    

 

"Great', said Rin "now I gotta dry off and throw on some clothes", he said as he grabbed a gray towel  and began to dry his hair first then work his way down. Kasumi and Kaito giggled as they floated into another room. When Rin was done his clock read five fifth teen, he than ran down stairs where he found his brothers and sisters sitting down enjoying breakfast as his father helped his mother set the table.

Rin rushed to his seat  and started to pack his plate.

 

"Someone over slept", said Hayata as she rolled her eyes.

 

"I didn't over sleep ,I just had to...", said Rin.

 

"He peed on him self",said Kumari, as he brushed back his long red hair

 

"Rin aren't you to old to be doing that",asked Kiyoshi?

 

"Yeah I mean what are you going to do when you get a girlfriend",said Shun as he pointed towards him.

 

"You guys leave  Rin alone "said Tanaka, as she whisperer into Rin's ear "it'ts okay you'll all ways have big sister",she said as she hugged him.

 

"Hey Yumi help me out here ", he said as he looked at Yumi ,she had her glasses on reading.

 

Geez ,what a morning thought Rin as his parents sat down ,they then prayed.

 

"Thank you for the food",yelled everyone before they started to dig in.

 

After eating ,Rin went out side to clean the Shine, in the shine were seven spirits, Teizo, kasumi &Kaito,Chiyzo, Kimkio, Namio and Kei, together they are our family great spirits. Rin walked inside the huge shine and ran to a rack and pulled out a rag and a bucket, he then walked back out to fill the bucket then  he came back in and started to scrub all around  the inside and the outside of the shine until his hands fell asleep. After he finished he  put everything back where it was, then he ran back into his house to grab his back pack. Rin then rushed to catch up with Kumori, Yumi, and Hayata. When caught up with them he heard Kumori fussing with Yumi again.

 

 

Those two all ways fight but no one knows why, well you might be saying to your self well that's what brother and sisters do but your wrong when these two fuss it turns into a magic spell battle since Yumi isn't a spirit user.

  

 

The walk to school was very long  and loud until,one of Kumori's friends walked up to us.

 

"What's up Matsumoto siblings", said Kenta doing some weird hand signals.

 

Kenta was a weird kid , he had been friends with Kumori since fifth grade after Kumori beat him up for stealing his animal crackers, Kenta was a short boy with blonde hair and blue eyes, he was kind of a jock I guess you could say.

 

"Nothing",said Kumori as he rolled his eyes and whispered something to Kenta that made him laugh.

 

The two then started to walk  far way form us into the distance leaving , Hayata , Yumi and me alone to walk in silents. I was so glad to get to school ,I ran so fast I got a cramp in my leg to catch up with my two best friends.

 

"Hey ya Rin", said Risa  as she ran to hug me.

 

"Hey', said Rin with a huge smile

 

"Stop drooling it gross", said Shouta walking over to them.

 

The bell than rung and Rin and  his friends ran inside to get to class

Reviews

[Lily Marie Tate]

-human like about these two
Extra space between human and like. Also it should be human-like.
-Good morning,Kasumi
Space between comma and Kasumi
-morning, Rin" ,
The comma goes BEFORE the quotation mark
-his brother Kumari as he
comma between brother and Kumari
comma between Kumari and as
-Geez what a morning thought Rin
comma between geez and what
comma between morning and thought
Geez, what a morning should be italicized.
-kasumi
Should be capitalized
-After eating Rin
comma between eating and Rin
-Huge
do not capitalize
-said Shouta walking over to them.
comma between Shouta and walking
There are a lot of extra spaces between words, some do not have spaces between punctuation and other words, and every quotation has a comma after it, which goes BEFORE the quotation mark. Please read through this. Bad grammar distracts readers from the story, and this is a good story.