Just Shut Up And Drink The Coffee

Its much shorter than it looks.

Its impossible to find me, 

Because I am a lie. 

I have lived to hide me 

for a whole stupid life. 

But all this time...

You have existed 

To love me.

God, why?

Why on earth 

Did you find me? 

There is nothing 

I can say to stop 

My heart from 

Breaking when I 

Look deep in your eyes. 

You see, you've seen the truth: 

I am a lie. 

I am trying 

So hard....

So hard to act alive. 

I breathe. 

(Is that what live people do?)

I smile. 

(Is that what live people do?)

I laugh. 

(I know I've seen them do that).

Darling, keep me satisfied

Because I can't afford to die. 

Could this be me.... Crying? 

You've seen this plea. 

Will you forget it? 

Get over dramatic, desperate me? 

Will you ignore the scream

Because its only in my eyes? 

Well, after all, we like my pet lie. 

Its easier to buy 

That the cold, hard truth: 

I've always wanted to be perfect,

Perfect, just so you

Would stop tearing apart my dreams,

Stop tearing apart

The better, stronger, darker 

Parts of me. 

By grace, I am complete. 

But, honestly, 

Do you really think I'll make it out? 

Get washed away before I drown? 

Someone could always find 

My dead eyes

Staring out from the tide. 

Oh... well, never mind. 

Because it had almost seemed fine,

Until I remembered...

I am a lie. 

Author's Note

Wrote this in Barnes and Noble yesterday, when I decided to not censor myself on how I felt. I'm not sure if its art or just stress release.

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

I like the strong and honest words in this poem. Life can twist us up and is hard to find a place to now peace. Most of us live a life in a lie to survive. Hard to be real and know the truth in this crazy life we must live. Thank you for a excellent poem.
Coyote

[OTownPete]

Stress release disguised as art is what I would say. tis a pity that one so young has so many paralyzing life questions. Your friend in words, Pete

[Tribute To Jadey]

Im not sure how the tittle fits into this piece, but I will say you have left me speechless.
Another moving amaing write. Well done.
So many raw emotions, and you have revelaed you...Wonderful

[trainwreck]

Yeah, this title is pretty obscure. Partially it's a reference to where I wrote it, and it's also a nod to the feeling of sitting alone with your thoughts. Thank you for all your reviews!

[Tribute To Jadey]

It was a pleasure, you do have amazing talent. Ah, well that explains why I did not get it then...I've never been to Barnes and Noble...I had to use google to tell me what it was.

[zach h.]

The title ROCKS! So does the poem. Very honest and open words. The second stanza was my favorite. I really liked how it was written. Good job.

[trainwreck]

Thank you for your two lovely reviews! I will be adding to the book as I can; hopefully 7 and 8 will be up this week.

Feel free to send me anything you would like me to read; I will do my best to respond quickly (I was on hiatus from writing, so I've got some backlogged RR's).

Again, thank you so much!

-Heidi

[zach h.]

You are most welcome. I look forward to delving into those chapters when they arrive. I might send you something later next week, after you have caught up on backlogged items. Best of luck on your writing!

[pumpkin head]

just is great as well as intriguing. love it

[YouoweYoupay]

It's obviously a release, of what I don't know, maybe of unclear aspects about you as a person? Is it art? Yes it is.

"I breathe.
(Is that what live people do?)
I smile.
(Is that what live people do?)
I laugh.
(I know I've seen them do that)"

-Lovely use of interrogation.

"Will you ignore the scream
Because its only in my eyes?"

-I adore two three things in poetry: good rare rhymes, use of colors and eyesss. Good job on that one!

"Because it had almost seemed fine,
Until I remembered...
I am a lie. "

-The perfect ending for an imperfect doubt in life and death. The first few lines of the poem were a bit weak, but attractive. I enjoyed this thought-provoking piece. Keep it up.

[Sourav]

It's a wonderful poem. I liked the way you've written it... very honest and a awesome write.

[M.E.Lyle]

Wow, I hope you didn't take out some of that stress on the fine folks there at Barnes and Noble. Might have made quite a scene. Sometimes a person's just got to vent. I wonder, don't we all live lies to some extent? This was a wonderful expression of ones innermost thoughts, or anxieties, or whatever it is I'm trying to say, and yes...it is art, and stress release; both, together. Imagine that.

[Kim's Poems]

Yes! A really Good strong write and truthful, I sincerely loved this.

[Jake Staffeld]

Holy crap. I thought from the title this would be a funny piece, but I was in for a surprise. This is really good. I personally don't believe in any gods, but we all still have some figure in our life who represents absolute power, and who is often telling us we can't do whatever, or to just fit in. And who isn't a lie, in the end?