OH, YOUTH (Couplets)

A collaboration with Neil Aranda

Oh, youth, I know you're really young at heart
Holding your fervor, unripe from the start.

You may answer all the questions with pride
But words maybe kept to show or to hide.

Baby, you are young and yet you don't know
There are many forests where rivers flow

But those that can bathe, I say, rare and few
Only the tenacious can bear the stew.

Too many crossroads I have seen and passed
But that doesn't mean I have won the mass.

Too many books I have read and grasped
But that doesn't mean I'll ask for a clap.

There are paintings that do not always show
The color to depict with afterglow.

You see some flowers to be beautiful
But once you hold them, they can be painful.

There are some blooms  that seem wild to the eyes
But one touch can reveal where weakness lies.

I won't let you ever take the wrong turn
And I won't  let you be the one to burn.

But why I feel you didn't realize
That I care for you, is this a fair prize?

Oh, little boy, please always remember
I am your mother, I am your mother.

Why can't you see I'm always here to guide?
Oh, youth, when will you see me at your side?

Author's Note

A couplet is a pair of lines of meter in poetry. Couplets usually consist of two lines that rhyme and have the same meter. A couplet may be formal (closed) or run-on (open). In a formal (or closed) couplet, each of the two lines is end-stopped, meaning that there is a grammatical pause at the end of a line of verse. In a run-on (or open) couplet, the meaning of the first line continues into the second.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Couplet

Reviews

[Lydia Shutter]

We only want what is best for our children. We want to give them the wisdom of our years and make sure they do not endure the hardships we have. The truth is, though, they must live their own lives and in order to believe the wisdom of our words, they must exeperience some of the very things we wish they could avoid. Your couplets are well written and filled with not only wisdom, but great images. I especially liked this one, "There are some blooms that seem wild to the eyes
But one touch can reveal where weakness lies." Wonderful! Lydi**

[Dhaye]

Thank you so much, Lydi.

[gabrielle]

When we were young we tend not to appreciate the advice from our parents. Perhaps the observation that we can only appreciate the wisdom behind all those words when we also become parents is true.

Pieta, a wonderful masterpiece to accompany this poem.

[Dhaye]

Thanks, Gab.

[NeiL ArandA]

Oh youth I know you're still young at heart . The way you reason unripe from the start . Or The conviction you hold unripe from the start .

Im presenting a different idea to your first opening line . The concept of the heart associating with youth is somewhat logical in the sense that in this state or stage the heart rules over their immature mind . Parents always admonish their young and naive teenagers not to follow their heart and instead use their mind because the mind is higher or positioned greater or above the heart . But the heart rules over the youth mind anyway . Just my take on the first opening couplet .

[Dhaye]

Oh, thanks for the remarkable review and that nice idea, Neil. I realized it is better. I'll take your concept...I just have to follow the meter.Thank you so much.

[NeiL ArandA]

PS Dhaye . the line trying go be nice lack depthness . Perhaps swap nice with wise or advice for rhyme. scheme . Mother is associated by their tough love . Nice is somewhat weak and compromising .

[Dhaye]

Okay, Neil. "Trying to be nice" weakens that line. I'll change it. Thanks. Why is it that you only show now your skill in critiquing? I hope you'll stay helpful as today. I'm grateful. Thanks.

[Dhaye]

Your suggested words "wise and advice" seem difficult to use, too, for the line starts with "That I care for you". To care never means you should be wise. Advice maybe apt, but I find it hard to make a phrase with 5 syllables to complete the line...so I just made "is this a fair prize?" which resonates the sadness of the mother in what she receives after showing her care. Can you tell me your opinion about this?

[NeiL ArandA]

LOL Im on Sir Joe mode .

[Dhaye]

? ? ?

[NeiL ArandA]

Brilliant adaptation Dhaye . Its even excellent . It add more deeper implications to the prize it pain and heartaches that a mother would have to bear and endure .

[NeiL ArandA]

Hi Dhaye Im here looking and reading this piece .

[Dhaye]

You made me smile, Neil. Don't you have any take on this?
Thank you for the visit.

[NeiL ArandA]

No problem Dhaye . Ill post my take on this . It should make you even smile .

[Sami Khalil]

Wonderful couplets on the subject of youth and how it a vital part of our life journey when we have power, vitality , ambitions and desires for so many things...A wonderful one...:)...........................

[Dhaye]

Thank you, dear Sami.

[Sami Khalil]

MY pleasure...Any time...:).............