Poem 2. Forgotten

Give one some gold then walk away and forget it for some good deeds never claim a prize but a peaceful mind and a heart for something you have done...

Happiness
After the shower of the fondest dreams I had
making me laugh and smile for a while
bringing me to the fairy land
of deception and white lies.

Excitement
After the confrontation of some mendacity
knowing the truth behind the lies
understanding what exist for a long time
that changes my suspicion like a crime.

Emptiness
After grasping the chance of being regenerated
making me satisfied for a moment
putting myself into the throne of hollowness
defending myself from my own distress.

Relief
After giving what I have like gold
which stands for all that I have all my life
and equals to a tiny piece of hope
that some time would be fair enough.

Acceptance
After sharing most of the few I have
Giving all of my golds though only bronze remains
I have to walk away for I should never claim
My prize is just a peaceful heart and mind that yearns...
All must be forgotten!

 

Reviews

[Thy joke on me]

This is great, I enjoyed it a lot, great job! I felt each part. :)

[Healing Star]

This is a very interesting look at how we go through things.
I have some trouble seeing the excitement part, or I guess how that section relates to excitement. Can you help me understand?

[Dhaye]

I just used excitement as other term for enthusiasm. Enthusiasm or eagerness to prove something we feel. Sometimes we feel there is something wrong but we are not sure about it, then we have that interest to find the truth. And finally, we are just to discover that we are being deceived for a long time. I'm sorry, sometimes the words I used are ironic here. Who would become excited for the realization of being deceived? I understand that sometimes my phrases are confusing. But anyway, thank you for your constructive comment, I have the chance to explain the confusing part.

[Healing Star]

Oh I get it now, the enthusiasm to figure it out, what we are feeling. But some people don't bother, it is too hard. Yes, I get it now thank you for explaining, I really like your writing. I think you are very good at getting down your feelings and covering everything, not just a superficial look at it. thanks

[Dhaye]

You're very much welcome. At least you are not just reading a composition but taking it's meaning to the deepest sense. A very good reader.Thank you so much for giving my work a part of your precious time.

[WhimsicalMind]

Excellent! I can relate to the wave of emotions one goes through. However, in the end we must accept things for what it is, forgive and move on. It is then that we can feel happiness again. I really enjoyed this poem! :)

[Dhaye]

thanks :)