Beats & Butterflies

Beats & Butterflies

A Poem by Hollywood

I love you He whispers in her ear.

She merely laughs,

did you expect her to say it back?

Her heart couldn't give you that satisfaction,

it's cold & still like an ice block.

Without beats & butterflies,

all those lovely things have gone bye-bye.

 

© 2010 Hollywood


Author's Note

Hollywood
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Featured Review

Ice queen! lol! Cool, calm in control but I don't envy someone in her situation. It's really interesting to see a poem break out the normal 'love poem' mode and head the opposite route and your line "without beats and butterflies" is powerful and a really well chosen title!

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

This is great! Her laughing at his I love you; sad and honest. Wonderful.

Posted 14 Years Ago


This is really amazing. It's childish and mature at the same time. How did you do that! lol Short, yet descriptive. Loved it! Keeping writing like this.

Posted 14 Years Ago


It is short and again to the point! VERY well!

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

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r
wow.... i know the feeling of this.... tis a great poem... nice work

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

oh wow! this is so powerful and so unike anything ive read before. it reminds me of a time when i had a hard time telling my boyfriend i loved him back. but this was a great read, i loved it :)

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


I loved how you summed the main points up using just 7 sentences.
awesome job! =)

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Thankfully this has never happened me...
Nice work on all the poems you sent me. You are very gifted.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Oh how sad that she is not ready to say the words... it doesn't mean she never will just that she is still hurting...I wonder if he will be strong enough to be ok with this??

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

It is a very strong stance on love

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

i like this. i expected her to say it back and she didn't. i think it would be neat if u expanded on this and told us why she is so cold to the idea of love (or maybe, just to him)

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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14 Reviews
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Added on February 27, 2010
Last Updated on February 27, 2010

Author

Hollywood
Hollywood

Stockton, CA



About
I'm Holly, I am eighteen. I like feed-back on my writing to improve myself. I'm loud, sarcastic, always smiling. Sometimes vulgar, rude & judging. :] note: for read requests i generally read onl.. more..

Writing
Marbles Marbles

A Story by Hollywood



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