Oak Tree

Under the big oak tree,

they feel a cool summers breeze.

The man says I love you

& pulls out a ring.

 

She gasps,

bringing her white gloved hand to her face.

It's beautiful! She exclaims.

 

Her red lipstick stains cover his mouth.

That white dress will have to be thrown out now.

They lay in each other's arms,

bride & groom to be,

under the big oak tree.

Author's Note

Comments?

Reviews

[Stephen Scaggs]

Dear Mr. Holly,

Thank you for the read request again. I do envy a bit how you can express what's on your mind. Expressiveness is key to a writer. I like willow tree versus oak trees, lol. Oh well. This has a nice flow to it, rhythm is good. Rhyme, again, helps the reader to focus better on the piece. "Under the big oak tree," is a good start for this piece as it does dive into the issue at hand. "She gasps, bringing her white gloved hand to her face. It's beautiful! She exclaims." How romantic, lol. I cannot do romantic/lovey-dovey stuff... most of my poems can be either cynical or dark. Thank you for the read request. Kudos... 8.5/10.

Sincerely,
S. W. Scaggs

[MattWheatus]

Very cute! Straight forward message well conveyed

[Brokensoul]

Simple and sweet it is !

[Gary McDonald]

Well you've really shown your talent here, in just 12 lines you've painted a beautiful picture, timeless perhaps. Perfectly capturing a truly romantic moment, well done.

[Tracie Skarbo]

this one brought smiles to my face... nice job

[Raven Radke]

LOVELY! VERY LOVELY!!

[Taylor H.]

cute. Really good. ♥

[Aussie]

Awwwh! I love this one,it's cute.Touching(: