Tear Up

Just something I love doing.

It will be in your darkest of times in which you grow the most. If you don't get it off your chest, you'll never be able to breathe. There are people who take the heart out of you, and there are people who put it back. Feelings are just visitors, let them come and go, but we tend to be products of our past but we don't have to be prisoners of it. The past is the past let it go and if someone wants to get up to leave and walk out of your life then I simply say let them go. In the end it's them who are missing out on a wonderful person and becoming the best person in your life. You can't let anyone make you feel like you're crazy for wanting what you know you deserve because you deserve more than what anyone thinks you deserve.

If you continue to focus on your past that scene will just repeat in your head. The scene I'm talking about is the scene where you're only two years of age and still watching that moment your grandmother past in front of you in your home. The moment you realize you lost her and still it replays in the back of your mind 16 years later being 18 now hasn't been easy. It's hard because you get engaged and then they feel like something is wrong all the time, but the only thing wrong is you keep watching the same video play. You think she's alive, but in reality she's gone. She's never coming back.

There is a line drawn between knowing and thinking you know, but it's not the same really your sister says "I think he molested me" you think and you know are two total opposite meanings you can't just say I think. The I think is what can ruin his life the knowing will ruin his life. Putting it on your father or mother is a powerful evil gesture. You know God would not be happy with that, but you still do it. You still say it because the only one you really care for is yourself. Why do you have to use your unborn son as a leverage against your dad? That's not right at all because unlike my sisters I would and could never use my kids as leverage a child deserves to know their grandparents. So why do it is my question. I know I jumped around in this, but there's meaning behind everything I write.