Sand grain

Sand grain

A Poem by Travis Lawrence
"

A metaphor for the human condition

"

A simple grain of sand,
waits, wishful for a wave,
with infinite comrades,
from view, not far away.
With a washed hand, reaches,
for one eroded speck,
pulls it from the beaches,
where it had felt neglect.
Now swims in the ocean,
deep, dark blue, and endless,
rid of all but motion,
no sights, no sounds, senseless.
The water's rise and fall,
sends the sand grain roaming,
as the sun's color crawls,
into bed 'till morning.

© 2008 Travis Lawrence


Author's Note

Travis Lawrence
My attempt at form. Six syllables per line, A-B-A-B rhyme.

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Reviews

I like how you gave yourself rules, it's a challenge sometimes isn't it
As for the piece, excellent
Love the metaphor of people being just 'A simple grain of sand' among the masses
Now swims in the ocean........rid of all but motion' great line and last two lines are great too
You have a way of ending with a real flourish, Well done
J.P.O.et



Posted 17 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Thought you were gonna lose the flow an ryhtm on the third stanza but the way it pulls together and keeps the flow and form is very well done. Really like this one.

Posted 17 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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299 Views
12 Reviews
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Added on March 6, 2008

Author

Travis Lawrence
Travis Lawrence

Austin, TX



About
I'm a 29-year-old using this site to backup my writings, which are mostly poems. Leave a comment if you like, they always make me smile. Have a nice day! more..

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