Don't be so sensitive

I’ve been working on my tact. I had no acknowledgement that I was lacking in this area until my husband and I started attending marriage counseling. It seems that my ability to think and say a particular thing, without any filter between the two, might not be appealing to all people. My other half has always been a little embarrassed at my way with words, though I’ve never apologized. I didn’t realize one was in order. So, after pointing out to me that my bluntness is sometimes a little too harsh for normal people, I went home and took a good look at myself. I came to the conclusion that the world today is much too sensitive.

I am a child of the 80s. Back then, we played outside, rode our bikes half-way across town, and didn’t come home until the street light was on. Even then, we still played nighttime hide-and-go-seek in our own yards. My parents were not sensitive to my emotions; they didn’t not hold or rock me when something was wrong. I could not count on them to wipe my tears away, and so I gained this knack for sucking it up and moving on. Whatever the problem might have been, I had to put those big girl panties on and get on with it. And yes, when we did something wrong, we got spanked. Maybe that’s why I can take a good smack on the rear every now and then and enjoy it. When I was growing up, common sense was expected. Our hands weren’t held as we walked through our lessons, we were simply told what to do and we figured it out. I remember, a time, after a family meal, that I was finishing up the dinner dishes. I had come to a pan that was in need of some serious scrubbing. When I asked my parents of an easier way to get the pan clean, I was told to use elbow grease. Now, at the time, I was not as wise as I am now and had no idea what this elbow grease was, but it sounded like something that would be kept with all the cleaning supplies. I searched underneath the kitchen sink and in the supply closet. I pulled things out and moved them around and still did not find this product that they had told me to use. Finally, they let me in on the little secret. Elbow grease was another way of saying ‘use some muscle, girl.’ That was an experience in common sense I will never forget, and, yes, I use that on my kids today.  So, with this upbringing, I am a bit more capable of laughing at myself and calling you out at the display bit of stupidity or lack of common sense.

I don’t mind being called out for my screw ups or crazy thinking, either. I am good at taking my own medicine even when it may be administered to me by someone else. If I am displaying a ridiculous behavior or train of thought, I, more than likely, cannot see it. I probably need someone to point out the fact that I am a bit off my rocker every now and then. And in my ability to accept these things, I usually expect the people around me to do the same. But it doesn’t always go that way. There are times when someone who is not quite used to the matter-of-fact ways of my world. They may walk away hurt, mad, and/or sadden by my examination and response. My facial expression, more often than not, shows a look of baffling disbelief, as I watch and listen to the ramblings of these common-senseless beings. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t set out to put anyone in their place or make anyone feel worse about them than they already do. But when presented with the opportunity I will gladly give my strong-felt opinion. I do not sugar-coat or tiptoe around. I just say it, whatever it may be. Most of my friends are this way, too.

Don’t get me wrong, we are not a group of intellectuals, sitting around the cigar shop with our glass of brandy, laughing at the ways of the world today. We do not sit in deep thought and conversation coming up with ideas on how we can enlighten the public around us. A lot of us are, however, realists. The fancy, dancing around each other’s feelings is not something that we do. We laugh; we have fun, often at each other’s expense. And then we get over it. I truly believe that if more people in the world today could spend more time laughing at the insanity displayed by others, there would be much less tiptoeing around and the real winners would be the ones who could just get real.

So, next time your friend tells you that you are acting like an a*s, suck it up. Don’t run off crying or ball up your fists in preparation for fight. There are no needs for tissues here. Simply take a look at yourself, thank your friend, and trot off in a happy way while calling out “hee haw, hee haw.” Don’t be so damn sensitive.

Reviews

[Anngellica]

Always.. and by the way.. you come from a long line of family members :) who say it like it is and at times have no filters.. ahh and enough times had to look at myself! It is who we are.. and at this moment.. just be you!