5

I remember it took me a while to get done with this chapter.... I wanted to make sure it went just right...

  My mom especially looked forward to the 4th of July block party. Almost everyone on this street just moves in for the summer, except for Deb, and the newly wed couple a few houses down. Every year, my mom would go to the near by supermarket, and buy some pre made brownies and desserts for the party. This year, she told me, was going to be different. She was going to make homemade cookies, and a layer cake.

 Layer cake.

 

Boy, did she have a bad reputation with layer cakes. We never made her forget the one incident, and it was easier since we had some of it on tape. It was before I was born, when Mitch was two, and early in the morning. My mom was preparing to go to a party, and thought it would be nice to make a homemade black cherry layer cake. Now, the camera wasn’t there to witness the actual action, but it got a pretty good shot of the aftermath. My father had heard the commotion, waking up, and concluded it was a job for the camcorder. He walked into the kitchen, slowly, and there was the mess.

 

Chocolate. Everywhere. First there was a shot of the initial mess. The cake. It looked as though The Rock Johnson had sat on it, therefore, resulting in a splutter all over the kitchen. The camera panned to the other parts of the room. All over the toaster. The counters. The sink. The ceiling. And then you see Mitch, two years old, sitting on the floor with a good mound of chocolate cake on his head, giggling his head off. The whole video, not a word, just the scenery, and my father said, “Well this is interesting…” And the camera shut off.

 

I didn’t need to remind her of this story, as she gave me a cynical look, even though I didn’t say a word.

 

Gabby was also excited for the party. She woke up early and picked out a pretty red, white, and blue dress. As me, who woke up at around 11, and threw on a pair of shorts and a t-shirt I grew out of last year so that it rose just short of my belly button. I didn’t realize this until my mom pointed it out to me, and I went and changed into a shirt that actually fit.

 

I wasn’t really looking forward to the party. I hated being around people I didn’t know, forced to make talk with them. They’d ask me how school is going, and what I’m doing for the rest of the summer. Like they really cared. I didn’t. The only good thing was that Deb was going to be there, but then again she’d probably run off somewhere with her friends or maybe Adam. I wouldn’t want to do that. Then she’d leave me with Nate. Spare me.

 

It was about time to head over to the Ansley’s, where the party is always held. They were this old couple who where always outside together in the morning, gardening. I came downstairs, tucking my hair behind my ear. She’d done it. A triple chocolate layer cake with frosting and everything.

 

       “Mom. You truly redeemed yourself!” I said.

 

  She made a face at me, which I assumed was 'You Didn't Have Faith In Me, Now What?", and yelled, “Are we all ready?”

 

 Gabby, Mitch and Dad came strolling out from the hallway. Gabby looked excited, as Mitch and Dad looked as if they were being dragged along. I was with them.

 

It was a family scene. My mom walked in front, carrying her very well accomplished cake, and the rest of us strolled behind. Mitch nudged me with his elbow and rolled his eyes at how lame this all was. Dad threw us a sideways glace agreeing. I craned my head to see Mitch, and noticed the sharpened pencil stuffed between his front pocket, and the crumpled paper in the back pocket. It was like non stop, huh? I wondered when he thought he would get sketching in, between the conversations and what not, and the weird people from the neighborhood breathing down your necks.

We got to the Ansley’s front yard, where people were saying hello to them, asking how their summers were going, blah, blah, blah. My mom did this too, with Gabby holding her hand, while Dad, Mitch and I went straight to the ‘party’.

 

There were a bunch of old people sitting in chairs, sipping their seltzer, and younger but still old people out on the dance floor, embarrassing America. They were those soccer moms and buisness dads dancing, I bet, those who think that their hip and that they could fit in real easy with just a swivel of their hips.I then saw Deb, who was talking with some friends over by the speakers.

 

      “Hey Deb.” I said and approached the group.

 

 They looked at me as if I had five heads.

 

     “Liz!” She grabbed my arm and pulled me closer. “These are my friends. Dan, Anna, Beca, and Mike, this is Liz.

 

 I took my quick observation of this little group in my head. Dan was tall and dark haired, looking as if he hadn't had  any sleep the night before and now he was being dragged here. Anna was just the opposite. She was short and quick, and a small peircing in her nose. Mike had his eyes averted from everyone else, curly hair, and green eyes. Beca... Beca. She looked... Well.. like a s**t.  She wore her blonde streaked hair down, heavy eye make-up, short skirt and skimpy top. 

They said all their ‘hi’s’ feeling required to do so. This is going to be a fun party.

 

        “Don’t look now,” Deb whispered into my ear. “But hot guy is here.”

 

  I didn’t look, I didn’t care. He was probably looking for me, but I kept my back towards him.

 

         “Ooh!” Beca whistled. She took a step forward. “Who’s he?”

 

        “Hands off Beca. He’s Liz’s.” Deb warned, and nudged me.

 

 I quickly nudged her back, and added, “No he’s not.”

 

          “So, he’s available?’ Beca said, and tilted her head to the side. Deb bit her lip.

 

         “Here she goes again.” Mike patronized. “Finds a hot guy, hooks up, dumps him, and moves onto the next one.”

 

         “Shut up Mike. And so what?” Beca said, already advancing towards Nate, who was standing helplessly by the punch bowl, hands in his pocket.

 

  I found myself scowling at her, and then stopped. She tapped him on the shoulder, and shifter her whole weight on one side of her body, twirling her streaked hair between her fingers. I hated her. I didn't even know her, but in a way, I did. I looked away, and back to Deb’s group.

 

         “Look at her. No self respect.” Dan muttered.  

 

        “What, did you two go out with her?” I asked.

 

         “Everyone has been out with her.” Anna answered. She fiddled with her lip ring with her tounge as she said this.

 

Deb laughed, which meant it was probably true. A few moments later, Beca was over in the group again, pouting.

 

        “He said he wasn’t interested. I don’t understand. Nobody says that to me.”

  

        “Well he probably has his reasons.” Deb pondered. I knew she was staring at me.

 

        “Liz, come over here for a second.” Deb said, and led me over to the drinks table.

 

        “Go! He wants to see you!” She said.

 

         “No. He’s good at stalking, he’ll find me if he wanted to.”

 

 She gave me a cross look, and said, “Let me fix your make-up.”

 

         “No Deb, stop!”  

 

       “Just for a sec, commere!” She led me again, but to the side of the house. She zipped her purse open, and pulled out eyeliner.

 

        “Deb-!”

 

         “Hold still!” She smudged with her finger and looked at my face. “Better.”

 

 We didn’t get but six steps from the side of the house when Nate showed up in front of us.

 

        “Hey Liz! Deb.” He was wearing a green 7-Up t-shirt, which I instantly recognized from one of my Adams collection of shirts. My stomach dropped a bit, but settled again. I imagined Adam suddenly, his feirce gaze that would make you feel almost smaller, the way he'd put your arm around you whenever his friends came around, and let you go when they left.

I would barley see him around school, since he was a year older than me, and our photography class that we had together ended after first semester. My friends always thought as our relationship as 'so middle school', because we would generally ignore eachother in the cafeteria, me sitting with my group and he sitting with his. I made an attempt one day, however, to sit with him and his popular friends, which back fired immediatly. But, for some reason, I kept going back to that table, wanting to be with him, and wanting to listen what the other girls were saying, as this was the gossip center of the school, and I like to know things first hand.

I wondered if he ever really liked me, or cared about me, but I shook this out of my head as quickly as my stomach settled.

 

        “Hi.” I mumbled.

 

        “Hey Nate, nice to see you! I see you’ve met Beca.” She genuinely replied.

 

         “Um, yeah. Quite a character.” He was talking to her, but looking at me.

 

        “Sorry about that, by the way.” I could tell she was waiting on me to say something, but she kept talking. She was never one for weird silences; I dont think she has ever had that instance, since she was always talking.

 

        “Forget it.”

 

         “Well listen, your welcome to hang out with us if you like-“ She looked over to where we were standing, but th spot where they were was empty, with only a few soda cans and napkins littered on the ground.

 

        “Uh… It seems like my friends got bored. They probably left for a bar or something.”

 

  She was cut off by some insane laughter from behind. I snapped my head around, to view my mother and Mr. Ansley coming up from behind.

 

          “Uh, oh. Liz’s mom. Seems like she’s having fun.”

 

        “Maybe if we don’t move, she wont see us.” I joked, and they both laughed, even though it was lame and I felt like a total a*s after saying it.

 

She walked right pass, just giving me a smile as she passed, and twinkled her fingers at Deb. She was using her fake laugh I noticed, and carrying a glass of white wine. She told me the other day how much she thought that Mr. Ansley was a bore, and that the only thing he would care to talk about was his garden and 'the cute little squirels that come and visit him in the morning, but he really thinks there there to see the garden knomes'.

There was a buzzing from Deb’s pocket. Probably a text. Her phone bill must be outragous.

 

 She read it and announced, “Sorry guys. I gotta go. Another party somewhere.”

 

 S**t. She was leaving me so early in the game? God, Deb. I’ll get you for this tomorrow. I had a feeling that she left on purpose.She squeezed my arm, and said goodbye to Nate. He looked at me. Again.

 

        “You might want to stay out of Gabby’s sight.” I said, trying to make some conversation. “She’ll see you and be riding on your back for the rest of the night. Don’t tell me that you don’t mind, you’re not a freak.” Wow. An actually extended sentence pulled out of nowhere.

 

          “No, I admit that I wouldn’t want that, only because I wouldn’t be hanging with you.”

 

I rolled my eyes. “Nice one.”

 

         “I thought I’d try.” He laughed. He took his hands out of his pockets. “Hey, they’re having fireworks out near the lake tonight. Do you want to go?”

 

 Do I want to go? Yes. Do I want to go with him? Not so sure.

 

        “I don’t know-“

 

        “Oh common,” He said, and play punched me on the arm. “Give me something here!”

 

          “I’m giving,” I answered “the not so cold shoulder. Take it and like it!”

 

  He shook his head. “That’s not giving me something, you did that on your own. "

 

         “No I certainly did not.” I replied quickly.

 

 He looked at me as if he didn’t believe me. I didn’t get here on my own. I forced myself. Deb forced me. It wasn’t me.  

 

        “So will you?” He asked again.

 

 I said I’d think about it, depending on how well the party went. It was pretty boring, overall, considering that half the people left before the food was 'served'. There were a few events that were worth going to, or watching from the sidelines like Nate and I did. There was family versus family badminton, which is always fun to watch because of the competitiveness and watching them actually get angry when they lost to the other team. There was one guy that I noticed lived across from us, actually throw his racket violently on the ground, kicking up dirt as it hit the ground. Then there was free play karaoke. Talk about embarrassment. My mom volunteered to sing the Pina Colada song, while I buried my head in my hands. Nate just laughed along with it. Gabby also did some karaoke, the B-I-N-G-O song, occasionally miss-spelling Bingo. B-I-G-N-O. I felt bad, because I knew Gabby didn’t like the crowd of people laughing because she was just so cute. After Gabby finished up Bingo, she spotted us.

 

          “You were seen…” I muttered.

 

         “Natie, you’re here!” She said, and climbed into my lap.

 

       “Gabby, you’re getting heavy.” I huffed.

 

          “Natie, do you want to come over after the party?” He started to say something, glancing over at me, but then I said, “Sorry Gabby. We’re going to see the fireworks tonight. You can go with Mitch.” Gabby pushed out her bottom lip. Nate smiled.

 

         “Go over to mom now.” I told her, and again, she obeyed. Nate stared, but didn’t look away. “What?” I hissed.

 

        “You’ll go? I mean, its just out by the dock, my dock or yours-“  

 

       “I got you out of playing Candy Land for the night. Just a favor.”

 

         “A favor?” He asked.

 

         “Yes.”   

 

       “I didn’t know you cared.” He joked.  

 

       “I don’t.” I said.  

 

        “Then why would you do me-”   

 

       “This isn’t 20 questions!” I knew he had me caught, he was standing over me, and I felt defeated. He didn’t say anything else, but sat there, smiling.

 

The party rounded to an end at around nine, the fireworks started at ten. I’d go home for about an hour, and agreed to meet Nate by his dock in his back yard. My parents thought I was going out on a date with him, Ew, and my mom offered to do my hair and make-up.  

 

        “Mom, no!”

 

 Mitch smiled to himself at the couch.

 

        “Do you have something to say?” I snapped.

 

         “Nope. Just have fun with your boyfriend. I punched him in the arm, not playfully.

 

          “God, you got a fist.” He grumbled.

 

         “I hope the bruise hurts tomorrow.” I said, and walked away.

 

 Gabby seemed upset that I was going over to Nate’s. She said it was because she wasn’t invited. She is very territorial I guess.

 

I was about ready to go, making sure my cell phone was in my pocket, which was buzzing non stop. I texted Deb about going to watch the fireworks with Nate after she asked if I wanted to go hang out tonight. She was freaking out, asking if she should text me what to say, or if she could spy. These people should just give it a rest. I walked out the door, without saying anything else. There were still people out and about, sitting in their front yards, sitting under the stars, and getting ready to watch the fireworks. I was taking the back route, through neighbors’ back yards, until I reached Nate’s. He was where he said he would be, all the way at the end of his dock. I’d have to sit right next to him. I reached the dock, and stepped onto it. He still stayed where he was, staring up at the firework less sky. I got another Deb text, making an obnoxious tone. He turned his head.         

 

  “And here I was, thinking you wouldn’t show up.” I didn’t answer, but stared down at the text Deb gave me.

    

    I HOPE THERE ARE FIREWORKS

 

Well…. It’s a fireworks show.  

 

        “Come sit.” He said, scooting over and tapping his hand next to him. I quickly texted Deb back, telling her to start shutting up.

 

         “Who are you texting?” He asked curiously.  

 

       “Sorry. It’s Deb being really annoying.”  

 

       “Isn’t that her, over there?” He nudged his head over to her house. I looked over to her back yard, where she was sneaking out from her back door.

 

        “Deb, you realize I can see you!” I yelled out, and she ran back.

 

          “What was she doing?”

 

 Being stupid. Spying. Making sure I didn’t make a fool of myself, like a cared. I didn’t say any of those things. Instead I shook my head.   

 

       “I’m surprised that you aren’t carrying Gabby on your back.” He chuckled.

 

        “No, but almost. She didn’t seem very happy about the fact that she’s not coming along. Or rather that it’s just you and me this time.”

 

 He smiled at this. “Are you upset that it’s just you and me this time?”

 

  I didn’t know what to say. I’m not sure I was, strangely.

 

          “No, not really.” I said casually, and kept my eyes on the water, but his were on me.

 

  BANG. The first fireworks set off, an explotion of green and blue. They came one after the other, coming from what seemed the water. The sound on them reaching the air hurst my ears.

 

        “So I talked to Deb before you came over.”

 

Uh oh.

 

  “A sentence like that could never end good.”

 

        “You don’t trust me?”

 

  I was surprised. He just jumped right into that one. I mean, I have only known him for a few days.

 

       “I met you a like three days ago. And I barley trust anyone.”

 

  He took it, and continued. “Why not?”

 

  Of course I didn’t want to talk about it. I wasn’t born being against everyone, but it happened last year at my school. I didn’t even want to think about it.

 

I cleared my throat. “I just don’t.” He could tell I was lying.

 

          “I don’t believe you.”

 

 This is what really annoyed me. Why did he need to know absolutely everything?

 

        “So why is it?”

 

        “I’d rather not say. In fact, I wont say at all! This is nobody’s business but my own!”

 

 We grew further apart suddenly. I couldnt see his face, all I saw was the 7-Up shirt spilled with moonlight.

 

        “Okay, okay. Put down the claws.”

 

  I didn’t entirely, but became very upset suddenly. It was bringing up bad memories that I had tried to push back into the darkest corner of my mind. I stood up, wanting to leave.

 

        “What’s wrong?” He said, and stood up too. I realized that the worry was going on inside my head, and the arguing voices were something that Nate couldn’t hear.

 

        “Uh, sorry. I gotta go. Thanks.” I started to walk away, but he grabbed my hand. Another firework wizzed up, popping and spreading out red, reflecting on the lake.  

  

      “I’m sorry. I didn’t want to make you angry.” He said.

 

        “ You didn’t. I just gotta go.”

 

Lie, lie, lie.

 

    “You have been here for five minutes! What’s wrong?” He asked again, and pulled me back.

 

I was face to face with him now, and for once, we looked at each other at the same time. I suddenly remembered what Mitch had said to me a couple of days ago. He didn’t take the chance and go to Philadelphia, now he’s in a mess and wasted a whole year. What if I cant trust Nate, which leads into not trusting anybody, which can ruin my life. I could see his face now, revealing Nate, not Adam, who was the one I was really mad at.

 

        “Nothing, sorry. Nothing is wrong.” I said finally, still looking at him.

 

 

If Deb was watching this from her bedroom window, shed be having a fit. I reassured him, but he wouldn’t let go. Of my hand, of my eyes. I thought for a moment that he was going to kiss me, but my pocket started buzzing just then. God damnit Deb.

 

        OMG, OMG. IM WATCHING ALL OF THIS!

 

Nate stepped back, and I excused myself to answer the text.

 

        IF YOU DON’T STOP TEXTING ME I WILL SLAM MY HAND TO YOUR FACE.

 

I closed my phone, and hated Deb at the moment. There were still fireworks going, and Nate and I sat and watched the rest. For whatever reason, I was so much more comfortable with him now. I didn’t wish he didn’t sit so close to me on the dock, that his fingers slightly touched mine, or that he kept looking at me every once and a while.

When the fireworks came to an end, I checked my phone witch was on silent mode, and there were five messages from Deb, all beginning with OMG, and ending with <3. Didn’t she have friends to hang out with? I left Nate standing on the dock, on better terms this time around. He had put his hand on my arm and said goodbye. Another buzz from my phone. Mitch was right. If I had left when I had first wanted to, and went like that, I would have regretted it. I would have to be totally awkward around Nate whenever I see him, and he just seemed o be popping out of every dark alley. It would seem that Gabby is going to get even more jealous in the very near future.