Just a Moment in Time

Just a Moment in Time

A Poem by Hannah Estar
"

The passion inside me described in poetry

"

Caught in your whisper

Just a moment in time

Your lips so much closer

A feeling sublime

 

A swirl of emotion

Catches my mind

A spiraling ocean

Our bodies entwined

 

A soft breath and heartbeat

Braced against my skin

Then, logic retreats

To let passion in

 

This spirit inside me

A breathing desire

You have the key

Light me on fire

© 2010 Hannah Estar


My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Featured Review

Often when I click on a lyrical, rhyming poem I don't get past the second stanza. I just cannot suffer a lyrical poem in which the poet does not pay attention to their meter. So when I manage to get through a lyrical, rhyming poem, that is a compliment. I found this poem to be delightful. it smolders with the anticipation of simmering passion.

My only suggestion would be to investigate reworking the line ...

"Against my skin"

... to have five beats instead of four. But this minor niggle in no way takes away from the overall beauty of the write.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

There is passion in this peice. Nice rhyme scheme and great write!

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Often when I click on a lyrical, rhyming poem I don't get past the second stanza. I just cannot suffer a lyrical poem in which the poet does not pay attention to their meter. So when I manage to get through a lyrical, rhyming poem, that is a compliment. I found this poem to be delightful. it smolders with the anticipation of simmering passion.

My only suggestion would be to investigate reworking the line ...

"Against my skin"

... to have five beats instead of four. But this minor niggle in no way takes away from the overall beauty of the write.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

264 Views
2 Reviews
Rating
Added on February 9, 2010
Last Updated on April 8, 2010
Tags: passion love

Author

Hannah Estar
Hannah Estar

PA



About
Build a beautiful day :) more..

Writing