Sometimes, when i come across someone who meant a lot .. I freeze and think of the times that have flown ..
Once Best Friends, now Complete Strangers ..
An open book.. yet a stranger .. That’s what I am.. to the world around..
I thought I knew.. you more than everyone.. Yet I know nothing.. beyond the word you...
I shared I cared... as I got what I gave.. But still I lose out... on the word called you...
I wait as the sun fades.. to the moment it rises again.. Yet I find it impossible to.. wait for the word called you...
I write to write the felt.. with ink and paper but.. Just as I seat myself down .. I stop at this word called.. you ..
Came across this certain someone, who I believe I never did anything wrong to.. and I feel like I'm guilty about something ...
Sometimes these silences can break you more than words ..
My Review
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I really loved the last stanza of this, it seems to bring the piece to a beautiful end. It's quite a lovely piece, and very understandable. I hope you work things out with the someone this is written about. Don't take too much blame, especially not knowing what you did..wonderfully done, my friend. x
Posted 12 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
12 Years Ago
things won't work out now ... i'm pretty sure
but blame .. i don't know, i will have to carry.. read morethings won't work out now ... i'm pretty sure
but blame .. i don't know, i will have to carry it all along the journey ...
thank you again :)
I like how the speaker addressed the person as "the word called you".
It's almost as if they're trying to distance the person. In my head as I was reading the poem I kept hearing "You is only a word. It's a word, a word, a word."
I'm not sure if that's what you were going for, but that's what I got.
I like it.
Hi Hamza! I like this piece because it portrays the feeling of not being able to get what you desire because of inexplicable reasons but also conveys the feelings you have developed for this person.
when i read the line "i write to write the felt" it struck me as boldly unique and very expressive and though i have read and written many poems on this subject, yours stands alone triumphant here on the merits of originality. "i stop at this word called..you.." nailed the lid down and blew me away. marvelous, simply marvelous!
Posted 12 Years Ago
12 Years Ago
those words were really too heavy for me ..
i feel i've been burdened with something i can ne.. read morethose words were really too heavy for me ..
i feel i've been burdened with something i can never stand grounded with...
i'm trembling ... thank you .. i'm short of words on this, i swear .. :')
Wow, th is is so heart felt! I loved it and this is very true in some cases. You think they are there for you then all of a sudden they are gone from your life.
Posted 12 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
12 Years Ago
that's the magic life plays on each one of us i suppose ..
thank you for your words :)
You have penned down your feelings very nicely which ofcourse stops at the word you. Beautiful ! Keep up the good work. Hope you get someone who is truely meant for you. :)
Holy cow this is amazing!!! The last stanza is particularly inspiring, definitely my favorite. It's so true how you think you know a person but in reality they couldn't be more different. I can definitely relate to that. This is such a spectacular poem, definitely going in my library. Definitely, definitely, definitely (that's my word of the day, can you tell? Definitely? I thought so).
and when i lost you
i realized it was never me,
it was always you !!
good work
Posted 12 Years Ago
12 Years Ago
no actually that would mean being mean...
with this we lose out on the value of being selfles.. read moreno actually that would mean being mean...
with this we lose out on the value of being selfless people ..
we live and die for others ... God wants us to ..
Hamza .. that's me .. An Engineer by profession and a writer by Emotion ...
I am 26...
I am no different, I am not special .. I'm just a different face, and a few different fingerprints ..
I am.. more..