chapter 5

 

 

I rolled the cup of coffee between my hands feeling the wamrth spread through my palms, the happy sounds of the Beach Boys floated through the air and to my ears.

 

 

 

An eldery couple shuffled into the diner and picked the booth in front of me, they began to whisper in heavy southern accents, bored I returned my attention to my coffee. The black liquid stared back at me and I willed some power through my hands, the shivers began in my spine and worked through my arms like an electric jolt, the coffee began to ripple like a disturbed pond. The music changed to an Elvis song and the coffee splashed over the side of the cup and I pulled my hands away with a hiss of pain.

 

"Careful there 'Hon, the coffee's fresh and hot."

The petite waitress bent over the table and filled my cup, I smiled at her and she smiled back, just two normal people flirting with each other. With the pleasures of the flesh so close, inevitabley I thought about the one I let slip away.

 

Lost in my own bleak thoughts I didn't notice my breakfast was ready until it was slid beneath my nose, I brushed the girls hand as she walked away, she didn't react. I looked at the clock and noted the time, I had a few hours yet until my bus left, what a depressing thought, travelling cross country on a chartered bus while the greatest race in the world was already uner way. My opposition could move much faster than me and for a moment I was worried I wouldn't get to it in time, that all this would be a waste.

 

The food was very good, it almost made me feel bad about not paying.

 

Holding hands the old couple ahead of me began to pray over their coffee, I couldn't help but stop and watch them, normal people and normal lives. Made me recall all the long nights of sleeping in alley-ways, and then motel rooms, sleeping on people's couches while they went about there day completeley oblivous to my presence. This wasn't normal, sometimes I felt like a junkie, chasing my drug with a mad desperation.

 

The texas sun crept through the long window and reflected off the tiles, I squinted and not for the first time today wished for a pair of sunglasses.

 

"How's the breakfast sweetheart?"

 

"Very, very good. Thank you."

 

She smiled and walked away, I touched her fingers,

"Excuse me, when do you get off?"

 

She turned around,

"Get off?"

 

"Of work, when does your shift end?"

 

She looked around and smiled,

"Four o'clock, but I'm very busy today, besides I have a boyfriend."

 

"Oh, pardon me then."

 

She gave me another smile and walked back to the kitchen, I frowned and told myself I wouldn't just tell her to come back to the motel with me, I could and no one would know better.

 

I looked outside and thought about that for a moment, well that wasn't entirely true, something was up. First meeting a Watcher face to face and then they rolled by me in a cadillac like a bunch of mobsters. They were definetely keeping an eye on me, I wondered if they were all over the world watching the rest of us, recording our actions, intervening to make sure we didn't hurt anyone innocent during this mad brief struggle for power.

 

Finishing my meal I stood up and walked past the couple as they drank coffe and whispered to each other, I was still a little angry about being rejected so I coughed and the little old lady spilled coffee all over her husband, I heard a sudden yell of pain as I opened the glass door and stepped out into the dry Texas heat.

 

Walking down the street towards the bus station I could barely open my eyes the sun was so bright, I couldn't wait to get back to Chicago where the buildings made shade on the streets and the sun was always obscured by clouds. I felt open and vulnerable, like a snake that had its rock suddenly overturned.

 

The bus station still wasn't air conditioned so I sat outside where I could at least hope for a warm breeze,

"Do you believe in God, son?"

 

I looked over at the ratty looking man wearing an old wife beater and ripped canvas pants, his hair was hanging below his ears in a greasy mass and a blond mustache hung above his wide smile.

"I'm sorry, what?

 

"God, boy, the almighty, Jesus Christ. Is he in your heart?"

 

I couldn't believe this, I started to laugh a little at the absurdity of the situation,

"Jesus? Jesus was a madman with a good PR staff, the only reason you still know his name is because he travelled with a bunch of writers and merchants."

 

With one of those condescending smiles the street preacher began to repeat some litany but I held up my hand and he stopped.

"Don't please, I got a headache. Listen, just go away, please."

 

I commended myself for my self-control, I must be maturing, the old me would have probably driven the man insane or done something equally unforgiveable.

 

With a dejected sigh the tall stranger walked back into the bus station, I swore quietly to myself, I was going to be stuck on a bus for god knows how long with that guy.

 

I shrugged my shoulders, it didn't matter anyway, I would probably just make them all forget I was there so I could get some sleep.

 

I didn't feel bad telling people what to do, or making them forget things. It was one of the first things I learned and it only got easier to do, I found people were more than happy to follow orders and let a face blur in the crowd.

 

Looking up I saw a hawk fly over head, sometimes I wish I was a shaman of old, so I could just turn into an animal and let all my human cares fall away.