Marble

A thousand pieces

It shattered into.

He let it slide from his fingertips.

Its descent was a ballet

The form and position were flawless.

Such beauty and untainted grace

The dance went on

The end drew near, it hit the ground

And my stained glass heart was then broken.

 

I’ve tried to fix it

But broken shards always show

The tears, scratches and cracks

Of the past.

 

My next one will be

Made out of marble.

 

Reviews

[O!]

Absolutely in love with this piece.....though once was in thousand pieces!!!

"Its descent was a ballet, the form and position flawless"....WOW!!.. what a way to describe such a breaking!!

Id take away the first to words of the last line.....
My next one will be
of MARBLE

that's my suggestion :-)

its going to my faves!!

Thank you.

[Kris Tate]

So much pain, yet so understated. This is a great poem if just for the difference of the emotion, you showed it without forcing it.

[Marie]

Nicely written.

[Gandré]

great sweet poem. I voted for you.

lara

[Ellie]

what a beautifully flowing poem. it was phrased beautfully and it said so much although it was short. way to capture everything that needed to be said. i really love this piece! great job!

ellie

[{Angel Redd}[Formerly A..]

For me, my breath stopped when i read "Its descent was a ballet..." Such a short line, but so very beautiful and descriptive. The rest of the poem was as delicate and graceful.

[Patrick A. Reeves]

Really fantastic, I love the "ballet" metaphor. I like the way how you wrote on an emotional subject without getting all emo... not that it's a bad thing or anything. I just like the way the tone is unique, it's like a figure skating play-by-play.Great job.

[T. Jones]

This is a really nice way of describing the heart and relationships. I really loved the last two lines:
"My next one will be
Made out of marble."

I completely get it: cold and hard. Or that's how I think of it.

I enjoyed reading this poem. Thank you for recommending it to me.

[Barry S. Maltese]

Oh how careless we can be with something so delicate. I like how you compare the two - both so fragile, and so valuable. You think we'd be more careful with something so precious, and who we entrust with it! Your composition is written so very nicely - as flawless as the fine crystal heart you wrote about here. Great job!!

[[untitled]]

Shalini!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Love it!!!!
i like the flawless line
did you mean for it to describe the glass heart and the ballet?
or am i looking at it to closely -.-;;