First

A Story by Strawbs

Meeting

As a young teenager my thoughts were focused on the usual… alcohol, music, having fun. There was no way i was able to predict how the nights events would change my future completley. I had no inclination of the future pain or happiness that would result from this event. Looking back on it now my heart is still undecided whether it would change it’s course or to continue through the trials of life. Everything happens for a reason. At least that’s what I keep on telling myself.

The day started off as normal as the rest, a childhood friend Anna invited me to a party which were common and nothing unusual. I had graciously accepted with a few nerves. After all i was entering a new social group and the pressure of meeting new accquantinces and being welcomed were high. Still, i was feeling excited to meet new people, to explore new venues, nothing could of prepared me for what was actually to come.

As I found myself walking up the narrow stairs to where the party was being held i noticed the cream of the walls, the humid air that clung to my skin. Voices were drifting down over the music and the pulse of the beat started to pump through my ears reminding me we were not alone and that i had to keep on moving upstairs towards the strangers who would eventually become some of my closest friends.

I took a step forward, another one and another until i found myself face to face with a door. Instantly I forgot what i was meant to do, staring at the wooden surface expecting it to creak forward and open of its own accord. I oustretched my arm and felt for the handle, it was cold as i gripped my fingers around it and started to open the door. My eyes scanned the room and i found myself to be in some sort of open communal passageway that were common in small flats. Immediately i noticed there was noise coming from a room ahead of me, my heart pounded through my chest with nerves. I stayed close by to Anna using her as my anchor as we walked through the hallway. The air went quiet and our party go-ers had realised that there were new guests that had arrived. I looked to where i could hear the music pulsating from, it seemed to be somebody’s bedroom that had been chosen as the place to be. One bye one i could see faces peep through the door way with questioning looks on their face as to who this stranger was, who was this girl that has decided to invade. Untill i saw one face which had me paralysed, who’s ice blue eyes pierced through to my soul leaving me feeling naked on the spot. Who was he? Who is this stange person that makes me feel so unsteady, that from the very first look had me captivated. Mere seconds had passed and i ripped myself from the secret exchange that was taking place but as i turned my head to assess the room i felt a strange loss inside of my body, an alien feeling that had yet to be bestowed upon me earlier in my life.

I entered the kitchen searching for where we could fix ourselves some drink and was not suprised to find the fridge had been stocked with various posions; Vodka, Rum, Whiskey, Beer, Cider. So far so good i thought to myself, at least i wouldn’t be the only one drinking. Anna and I helped ourselves to drinks whilst i could hear somebody approaching from behind.

“hey there how’s it going Anna, who’s your new friend”

I turned to face the voice, standing infront of me was a tall guy, slim frame and kind eyes.

“Hi My names Natalie, how’s it going” i replied, i could feel my smile break free naturally in meeting this new stranger.

“My names Colin nice to meet you Nat, once you’ve served up head back in and join the fun” Colin smiled back so innocently that i took an instant liking to him, this would be a good friend, somebody i wouldn’t want to hit in the face in the near future. He winked and left the room to rejoin the others who i could hearing laughing over the music.

Anna and i entered the main room and i as i let the vodka lemonade slide down my throat causing it to burn with a sweet sensation my nerves had calmed and i felt a new found sense of confidence that had appeared from thin air.

“hey guys this is Natalie, we’ve been friends for like… years. Basically since were were like kids you know the one i was telling you about” Anna proclaimed to the whole room. She never seemed to be lacking in over confidence. She was a plain girl, plump with mouse brown hair. Her brown eyes didnt shine like the stars, her voice didn’t sing to you when she spoke, she was just the average girl, with a kind heart.

“hey”

“hey there”

“hiya”

A chorus of welcomes attacked me from around the room. Somehow this wasn’t going to be as bad as i thought it would be. I took my seat next to Anna on my left and listened to the usual coversation. I turned to my right to see a petite girl with long brown hair and the same ice blue eyes i had seen earlier.

“Hey i’m Emma, you okay?” Emma’s presence was relaxing and enticeing, she had an air of excitement about her. That you knew she got u to trouble, but trouble you would want to be a part of. I knew we would be friends instantly. What i did not realise is how close we would eventually become and that she would be known to me as one of my closest friends, my family.

“Yeah not bad thanks Emma, Natalie as you know, aha. Everyone seem’s pretty cool and fun”

“Yeah you can’t get a better bunch then these, they can be a little crazy at times but you’ll learn to love them” Emma gestured to the room and my eyes followed. They caught a pair that matched Emma’s ice blue, a pair that i had seen earlier in the night. I smiled and tried not to run for the door as my heart pounded and my blood pulsed through my veins ready for me to fight or to go for flight. Breathing steadling not to give suspicion that my reaction had been a little over the top when coming face to face with somebody you didn’t know. Oh s**t, i was staring again. I snapped my attention back to Emma but i could feel the burning stare that was aimed at the side of my head, daring me to look back. I calmed my nerves by chit chatting with Emma and Anna for a while, getting to know about the other people in the room. I learned that Emma’s boyfriend Kain worked for the local superstore and stood at 6ft 3. Cathy was an old friend of Emma’s from school with bleached blonde hair and oversized feet that were the but of the joke on frequenting occasions.

Emma and I decided that we need a top up on our drinks and headed for the kitchen when a voice called out…

“Hey Em wait up i need a drink”

“Hurry up then you lazy piece of a*s i ain’t your slave!” as Emma turned around welcoming the new presence with such familarity a jolt of jealousy shot through my blood, strange it was , what on earth was going on?

I turned towards to male voice with Emma and felt my face freeze, it was him. The one with the ice blue eyes that had me locked in place.

“Hey i’m charlie Em’s brother nice to meet you” His grin stretched from ear to ear and i felt mine shine in return. He was her brother, relief flew through me. Why was i relieved? I don’t even know who this person was. He leant forward to give me a hug and my ability had failed on all accounts, the only thing i seemed to be able to do was smile back like a*s. Oh what an a*s. As his the skin of his hand reached the back of my neck my body thawed and i managed to lean forward and place my arms around his broad shoulders. As our skin connected i couldn’t feel a spark that was told in children’s bed time stories. What i felt threw me aback and shocked me to the core, an explosion of belonging and excitement came from within and all too soon the contact ended and my skin turned cold.

“Nice to meet you Charlie I’m Nat” i had no idea how the words escaped from my moth, or how i had even managed to pull a full sentecne together.

Charlie picked up his refilled drink and headed back towards the party scene, as he reached the doorway a moment hesitation stopped him for mere seconds making the blood to come to my cheeks of the anticipation of talking to him for a while longer. He seemed to shake off whatever the feeling was that had come over him and walk out of the room.

“He’s a pain in the a*s but you gotta love your brother right, he’s been in a bit of a mood ‘casuse he’s just had an argument with his girlfriend Lauren today. But he seems to have perked up a bit”

An unexpected sharp pain hit me across my chest, a sadness that was unexplainable.

All i knew that Charlie had brought something out of me that i had never experienced before and that my heart would start to break from that moment onwards when i heard that his heart had already been claimed. What i didn’t know is that a heart can be broken into pieces and then ground into dust. What i didn’t know was that all the pain that i had previsouly felt was scratch compared to the days ahead. And that i wouldn’t change any of it for the world.