Anamnesis Inc.

Anamnesis Inc.

<Anamnesisinc.exe>

 

“There is something at work in my soul, which I do not understand.”

Mary Shelley �" Frankenstein

 

***

 

Falling backward into a pool of darkness… deeper and deeper… a light exploding quietly, high up on the surface of the water… a flickering eyelid. The light streams down into the abyss, pulling me rapidly back up… a sharp breath in and my right eye opens. I move my eye to the right; light boxes revealing x-rays of a buckled torso and shattered skull. Looking left, I see a window framing a dark night sky. I can just make out my surroundings now. Small and white, a hospital room. At the end of the bed, a man in a white coat�" a doctor. The doctor is calm, collected. And, a woman �" distraught clutching her bag. She is sobbing. I am trying hard to remember her, but there is nothing. I know her, though. I think that it is me that is the stranger. Sounds begin to bubble up emerging slowly from the water. The garbled sounds of blipping machines and the doctor and the woman talking. Dull pain… a vague cluster headache rumbling in my left optic nerve. I know now. I can feel the absence of it. My left eye is gone. A heavy weight in its place. I have forgotten everything. I am dissociated from myself, yet trapped in my own body. I am a stranger to myself…

 

 

***

 

“Yes, yes… we have given him something so that he won’t be in any pain. He’s had quite a bit of work done, Mrs. Danile.” Doctor Spratt said coolly. He was a short man, yet unaware of his domineering presence. “He’s certainly very lucky, your husband. The crash should have killed him but we have an excellent orthotic and prosthetic unit here at the hospital.” Spratt was quite pleased with himself. “His new arm has assimilated well with the surrounding tissue and should be functional almost immediately.”

 

A diminutive figure, hunched over with unkempt, mousey blonde hair, Mrs. Danile was doing her best to keep up with the doctor. She was crying softly, taking in her husband’s transmuted appearance. His left forearm was gone. In its place, a steel, robotic prosthetic. The thought of it was contorted, incomprehensible for Mrs. Danile. She did her best to hide it from her husband.

 

“But what about his head injury, doctor?” Mrs. Danile whispered shakily through her tears.

 

“Well… it’s hard to tell at the moment.” The doctor paused. He was pretending to assess the patient in front of him. “He sustained severe damage to the frontal lobe of his brain, pushing back, disrupting the temporal lobe; the amygdala and hippocampus.”

 

What does this mean, Doctor? Will he be ok…?” the pitch of her voice was rising, wavering.

 

“He should have died, Mrs. Danile”, the doctor responded bluntly. He sighed, “This kind of damage can have a number of side effects. His personality could change, rapidly shifting moods, complete memory loss of course. But, you did the right thing signing on for memory insurance”, he said with a condescending smile. “We’ve managed to salvage quite a lot of his memories in fact, from deep in his subconscious. He’ll get back most of it. Anyway, if there are any major parts missing, we can ‘airbrush’ around the edges a little.” He chuckled to himself. “Welcome to Anamnesis Inc., Mrs. Danile.” Spratt pronounced rather dramatically, outstretching his arms. “The Anamnesis program is the hospital’s shining beacon at the very forefront of medical technology. A new frontier, Mrs. Danile. It will give him the best chance to return to a relatively normal life.”

 

Her body shaking, Mrs. Danile found herself completely overwhelmed. She had taken out the memory insurance, even though it was at a high price. This brought her some comfort. But still, she did not entirely trust Anamnesis Inc., or Doctor Spratt for that matter. Ignoring Mrs. Danile’s distress entirely, Spratt continued to boast about his pet project. “We have inserted the Anamnesis hardware into the frontal lobe through the back of the mechanical eye. This stimulates the neural pathways leading to the temporal lobe.” The doctor moved his hand ostentatiously around the x-ray of the skull on the light box. “It will stimulate a complete reboot of the brain; memory and emotion will be uploaded and he will be his old self in no time. It will take a few days for the uploads to be complete mind you. There may be some minor hiccups initially, but he will be safe to return home in the morning with your support. Amazing. Just amazing what we can do these days.”

 

“Thank you Doctor, thank you,” Mrs Danile reached out for her husband’s right hand.

 

“Well, should we proceed?” Doctor Spratt unconsciously clicked his heels together ever so slightly. 

 

There was nothing to think about. “Yes, please, yes.”

 

Spratt approached the patient, reaching towards the new mechanical left eye. With a precise grip on the ocular rim surrounding the sclera, the doctor turned his fingers gently. The socket clicked into place.

 

***

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Begin Installation…

<danile@anamnesisinc: ~$>

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

 

The words project instantly on the inside of my retina; bold green letters with a flashing ellipses. It is searing into my visual cortex, emblazoned in my mind’s eye…

 

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Installing software…

<$ sudo apt install anamnesis.exe>

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Now… a strange feeling of detachment. I feel nothing, my emotions are muted, but I can see myself in the back of my mind.

 

***

 

“Just a little something to help you nod off to sleep, Mr. Danile.” The doctor picked up a gas mask attached to a silver tube marked ‘nitrous oxide’. He placed the mask on the patient’s face.

 

Mrs. Danile spoke gently, “Go to sleep René. See you in the morning. I love you,” as she removed her hand from her husband’s arm.

 

***

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Initialising memory files…

<danile@anamnesisinc: chmod a+x danilememories.bin>

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

 

René. My name is René…

 

And you are Anna…

 

Thoughts sinking like anchors into the water…

 

Such a dark dream… I am moving at speed. The rain is sheeting down, I can hardly see the road in front of me. I hear the low hum of my bike underneath me, feeling the traction of the wheels, every bump of the highway.  But, something is starting to change. Something is happening to me; something is wrong. Sudden, jagged memories intruding into my thoughts and vision.  Violent images, incising into my consciousness… and the bike is sliding, drifting out to the opposite lane. There’s something coming in the distance. A bright light getting closer and closer. I am drawn to it. A piercing sound is rising all around me. It is becoming clear now. It is coming into view. The white light separates in two, the sound is blaring, and… it is too late. The bike is on its side, sliding out of control. Light engulfs me for a single moment and then, I am thrown high over the guard rail and into the night sky. I wake up for a second. I see my mangled bike, the car tipped over, jaws of life working frantically to free the passengers. The pain is too much. It is agonizing. I am drawn back into the water…   

 

***

 

In the coming days, after returning from the hospital, Mrs. Danile kept a close eye on her husband, René. He remained confined to his bed, but his sleep was shallow and interrupted. At times, Mrs. Danile was woken in the middle of the night by her husband shouting; incomprehensible ranting. He would often be sitting bolt upright, with his head drooping to one side, talking to himself. It was terrifying and Mrs. Danile did not know what to do. She rang the Anamnesis Inc. ward at the hospital but Doctor Spratt assured her that these strange affectations would cease and not to worry. She did not know if she could still love René if he remained the way he was. But she sat by his bed and spoke to him gently, placing her delicate hands on his arm, reliving memories of better times. She talked about their wedding day. The two of them on the beach, laughing and dancing. It was so bright. She brought her husband the photograph from the living room that memorialised their marriage. The sun was warming the lens; two young newlyweds affirming their love in a heartfelt kiss. Looking at the photograph, Mrs. Danile spoke softly to her husband, “Please René. Don’t forget us. Don’t forget who you are.” She talked of a bright future full of love and children. But, she was alone.

 

On the 3^rd day, Mrs. Danile was washing the dishes in the kitchen, light streaming through the window. She was lost for a moment, staring blankly at the back garden.

 

“Anna?”

 

She froze, bracing herself, slowly turning to the sound of the voice behind her. And there he was in all his glory, the afternoon sun revealing the full extent of his injuries. René was a monstrous figure, the bandages around his head, the folds of skin clenching around his ghoulish robotic eye. His right arm dangled at his waist, a brutish, mechanical disfigurement. He stumbled gingerly toward her, leaning against the counter to steady himself. For a moment, Mrs. Danile said nothing. Then, breaking inexplicably from her motionlessness, “René…” She outstretched her arms, hugged him gently and started to cry.

 

Mr. and Mrs. Danile sat in the living room, the television on quietly in the background, breaking the silence. For the first time since the accident, they spoke.

 

“René, I… how are you feeling?”

 

“I remember you, Anna. I thought I’d lost myself. I remember now.”

 

Mrs. Danile sat tensely on the edge of the couch, wringing her hands. “That’s good René. You’re coming back, I can see it.” She smiled a broken smile.

 

“Each time I sleep, I remember more, but I think I’m finding myself again.” René said, drooling and slurring his words. Mrs. Danile’s heart was breaking. It was all too much for both of them. She took her husband back to the bedroom, lay him down and stroked his arm until he slept.

 

***

………………………………………………………………………………………………......

Checking memory usage…

Data drive reaching capacity…

<danile@anamnesisinc:~$ free -g>

………………………………………………………………………………………………......

 

Something is starting to change… The memories are coming fast now: my Great Grandma holding me as a child, my father’s hands. I remember meeting Anna. She was so beautiful. I knew we would always be together. I remember my school, my friends… and I remember the crash. It keeps coming back, getting in the way. I feel all of these memories flying past me like a reel of never ending photographs. And their coming in such great waves. I can feel them all. All the happiness, despair, the grief, the love. It’s all too much…

………………………………………………………………………………………………......

Partitioning drive…

<danile@anamnesisinc:~$ sudo fdisk/dev/loop>

………………………………………………………………………………………………......

It’s pulling me, one way then the other. I’m breaking up. I’m splitting apart…

 

***

 

At 6:00 am the next day, Mrs. Danile woke up contented, her mind still not awake to the nightmare she was living. Her eyes opened slowly and she yawned with her whole body, stretching out her arms and curling her toes. Becoming cognizant of her surroundings, Mrs. Danile could hear a strange droning sound emanating from the living room. She put on her dressing gown hurriedly and crept along the hall to investigate. Turning into the living room, running her hand along the wall of the corridor, she peaked round the corner. And there stood René, facing away from Mrs. Danile, vacuum cleaner in hand pacing rapidly around the room. The bandages from his head had been removed revealing his misshapen, shaved head and his articulated arm was malfunctioning, metal skin rotating and sliding at the joints. Mrs. Danile slowly backed out of the room into the kitchen, her bare feet stepping on a freshly mopped floor. The dishes were stacked neatly by the sink and the counter tops were spotless.

 

“Anna? Is that you?” An unsettling amount of energy in René’s voice, vibrating along the walls from the living room.

 

Mrs. Danile’s breath was rapid, her heart was beating fast. “… Yes René?” She entered back into the living room, “what, what are you doing?”

 

René’s head twitched backward, a hair trigger reaction. “It has to be clean, Anna. It has to be clean.” He sped wildly around the room like a robot gone haywire; mechanical jerks and seemingly involuntary gesticulations.  He stopped suddenly, remaining hunched over. Turning his head deliberately, he looked Mrs. Danile directly in her eyes. René spoke, “I feel so much better, Anna. I feel like I could do just about anything today.” His words were suddenly flat, affectless. “I can hear everything so clearly; the birds in the yard outside. And the colours are so vivid, Anna. I feel truly alive.”

 

“That’s good, René. That’s good.” Mrs. Danile’s body was rigid, rooted to the spot.

 

And René was suddenly animated once again, his words racing, “Yes Anna. I can feel again. I feel the sun shining through the window on my skin. I feel love again… for you Anna. I love you.” And as he said the words she had been longing to hear, his cheekbones rose ever so slightly, his right eye opened wide and his mouth sickeningly drooped into a frown. It seemed to Mrs. Danile that he was smiling and frowning at the same time.

 

***

………………………………………………………………………………………………......

Overclocking detected…

<danile@anamnesisinc:~$ speedtest-cli --bytes>

………………………………………………………………………………………………......

 

It all feels so good again… I can hear the rushing of the wind through the trees outside, the melodies of the birds, all new and such rich colours in the sky. I can feel again, such a rush of emotion. Pure joy and love. Real happiness. I feel strong, much stronger than before. I know I can be whatever I want to be. I can take on the whole world. I am free again. But… everything must be in its right place. The house is a mess. She has made an awful mess of it. She hasn’t cared for it. I will show her, she must try harder. I will show her… But wait…the eye is blinking again…

 

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Downloading patch…

<danile@anamnesisinc:~$ diff < danilememories.c newmemory.patch>

 

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

 

No, no. What’s happening? All the joy is fading. The eye, it’s taking it all away. Don’t leave, this feeling, so… uncontaminated. What is happening to me? I feel a huge wave crashing in slow motion down on me, the roaring boom surrounding me. Now, nothing. I have to sleep. I’m falling backward into the dark water….

 

***

 

René collapsed suddenly where he stood, dropping the vacuum cleaner on the floor. His knees buckled and his head hanging down to his chest, he had lost consciousness; a marionette whose strings had been cut. Mrs. Danile rushed to pick him up but could not bear his weight. The light in his robotic eye flickered intermittently, and then he woke once more, his face still void of any emotion. Mrs. Danile laid him down on the floor as best she could and rushed for the phone. She dialled the number for Anamnesis Inc. hurriedly. The receptionist answered, “Anamnesis Inc., how can I direct your call?”

 

“Please, I must speak to Doctor Spratt. It’s my husband. Something is wrong.”

 

“The doctor is not in today I’m afraid. Is this Mrs. Danile? Madam, you really must stop ringing here. Doctor Spratt has been more than generous with his time. All of your husband’s symptoms will abate very soon. In the meantime, please stop calling. Goodbye, Mrs. Danile.” The receiver clicked. Mrs. Danile was left alone once more with the stranger that should have been her husband.

 

A crumpled, corpselike figure lay on the living room floor throughout the night, its arms and legs beginning to twitch as dawn broke in the early hours of the morning. Mrs. Danile had not slept for fear of what might happen, sobbing gently to herself and keeping one tired eye trained on the body. Without warning, René awoke, his head contorting and twisting, as he took in his surroundings. He fixed his gaze on Mrs. Danile. She paused for a moment in shock before she spoke, “René? Is it you René?”

 

René took a moment to answer. “Anna? Yes… yes it’s me.” He picked himself up off the floor standing disorientated across the room from his wife. “What happened, Anna?”

 

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Firewall intrusion…

<danile@anamnesisinc~$ firewall-cmd enable>

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

 

“You, you’re not yourself, René. Something is wrong… do you remember me… us, I mean?”

 

He took a moment, “Yes... yes. I remember it all. Our life together, our plans. And you… you took me to that hospital, that doctor. How could you take me there, Anna?”

 

“What do you mean, René? I had to. You would have died.”

 

René’s head started to twitch intermittently as he reached his hands to the sides of his head. “How could you take me to that doctor, Anna? He’s in my thoughts, I can feel him. He sees everything. He is spying on us both, Anna. Don’t you see? How could you trust him?” The twitching in his head increased in intensity and his voice rung louder as he spoke, echoing some primal part of himself.

 

 

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Virus detected…

<danile@anamnesisinc: sudo /etc/init.d/clamav-anamnesisinc stop>

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

 

René stood up completely, taking clumsy steps toward his wife as he spoke, “He knows everything, Anna, don’t you see? He can read my thoughts. He’s implanting thoughts too, yes. I’m splitting apart. Where do I begin? But you must know, Anna. I see it all now. You and him, working together. Yes, you know exactly what I’m thinking, don’t you? It’s you, making me feel this way.” He was looming over Mrs. Danile, his robotic arm hanging menacingly by his side.

 

A sudden impulse, Mrs. Danile rushed for the kitchen, but still within René’s reach. He wrestled with her, holding her against the wall. “It was you, Anna! It was always you!” René raised his robotic arm to Mrs. Danile’s face, rotating it slightly. Mrs. Danile opened her mouth to scream but there was only silence. She shut her eyes in horror. Holding his arm back, and with the full weight of his grotesque, prosthetic arm, René’s metallic fist flew toward Mrs. Danile. An explosion of sound. And then nothing. Mrs. Danile opened her eyes. René’s arm had narrowly missed her face, instead punching a hole in the wall inches away. Then, just moments after the frenzied act had started, René was motionless once more, a freeze frame, his body seemingly suspended by his robotic arm in the broken wall. Mrs. Danile was breathing heavily. She didn’t want to move in case he woke. She slowly slid her body from René’s grasp and fell back on the floor, stunned. A million thoughts were flying through her mind but she could not seem to catch any of them. Grappling for her senses, she reached for the phone and called the police.

 

***

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Corrupt files isolated…

<danile@anamnesisinc:~$ sudo fsck -p /dev/denilememories.bin>

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

 

A deep pool of darkness… a light exploding quietly, high up on the surface of the water… a flickering eyelid. The light streams down into the abyss, pulling me rapidly back up… a sharp breath in and my right eye opens. I have been here before. Light boxes humming on the wall. I see a window framing a dark night sky. That same sterile hospital room. But this is my cage. They have shackled me inside myself. This doctor and my treacherous wife. She is complicit in all of this. They have fooled me, filled me with false memories, twisted up my emotions. I remember everything but do not know who I am…

 

***

 

“Well Mrs. Danile, it seems you’ve had a bit of trouble here, wouldn’t you say?” Doctor Spratt smirked superciliously.

 

“Yes doctor… please… please. He isn’t himself at all. Something’s gone awfully wrong…” Mrs. Danile was sobbing into her hands.

 

“Now, now. Settle down there. He’s quite securely restrained I assure you.” Spratt was searching to find the reason for Mrs. Danile’s tears. “No need to get hysterical. It’s an easy fix really. Your husband has lapsed into a state of ‘paramnesia’.” He laboured on the word, spelling out each syllable.  “His brain has rejected some of the memories we restored from his last Anamnesis build and replaced them with rather aggressive delusions it seems. Very rare, very rare. We’ll have to erase the corrupt files. Of course there will definitely be memory loss but he’ll be feeling fine in no time.” The doctor was taking a more conciliatory approach.  “The files won’t assimilate again I’m afraid. Emotional memory will be impacted the most. Still, his aggression will be controlled. He’ll be living in a nice, sedate sort of… fugue state.” The doctor was quite particular with his words.

 

“Is that all that can be done, doctor?”

 

“Well, count yourself lucky, Mrs. Danile. Your husband will be in the land of the living. It has to be better than his current condition.” Spratt was cold, dispassionate.

 

There was nothing more to do.

 

Doctor Spratt moved toward René, “just a quick turn of the anterior edge of the synthetic socket, and…” The doctor reached his hand deliberately toward René’s digital eye pausing inches away from it. A second passed… and all of a sudden, something awoke in René. His robotic arm shot up, tearing through the restraint. The arm grabbed the stupefied doctor by the neck, raising him violently off the floor. The rest of René’s body went into seizure, his arms and legs bursting through the cuffs securing his body to the bed. He was flailing wildly, his head twisting from side to side in rapid movements. Mrs. Danile screamed and reached toward René’s right arm, trying desperately to hold him down. “Please René, please. Let him go!” Mrs. Danile cried. The doctor was struggling for air, his consciousness fading.

 

 

Seismic explosions in René’s neural cortex formed a great tidal wave of emotion; rapturous euphoria washed with depths of despair. He was feeling everything again, every feeling he had ever had, all at once. Memories flickered through his mechanical eye once more; the reel moving faster and faster from his childhood until the day of the accident. He was lost in it all once again.

 

Mrs. Danile cried out, “Please René! Please… Don’t forget who you are!”

 

And suddenly, inexplicably, the reel of memories in René’s eye halted, pausing on a single beautiful portrait in time. The sun warming the lens; two young newlyweds affirming their love in a heartfelt kiss. René drew breath, his seizure had broken. He looked at Mrs. Danile, “Anna,” he spoke softly, a kind of realisation. René dropped Spratt’s rag doll body to the ground, Spratt scurrying away backwards on the floor finding his back safely against the wall. René took one last look at his wife. Deep in her eyes, a profound understanding. He reached his robotic arm to his eye, and with a twist of the socket, he fell into the darkness, back into the water…

 

***

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Reboot…

<$ sudo reboot>

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

 

I am floating, weightless. I am empty, devoid of memory, essence less. I am not afraid. I am not alone. I know now… I am René. You are Anna.

***

Author's Note

Any criticism welcome