Wishing on Stars in DisneyLand.

I would have happily fallen back asleep right there,

not moved much, and been content to match my

breath again to a steady rate [of someone else].

 

                but my brain kicked in, you’re

the last people I want to ruin anything with.

so on with my shoes, quick to the door.

a fumbled hug, that I would have liked to be more

 

       

    I stand in the road, mystified by the magnitude

and intensity of the world. silently blessed by the

sprinkling rain fall, my breath turning swiftly into

steam, the cold stealing what little air I had left.

Driving home safe, much like you insisted,

turning over everything, recounting every moment

and realizing, that this is something that I’ll

just have to hand up quietly to the stars

 

                let them decide.

because I am now pressed surely between

a rock and a hard place. Between friendship

and whatever this could be.

                                nothing my heart reminds me.

                you will always, forever, be nothing.

           and you’ve done that to yourself.

Reviews

[J.Black]

" I stand in the road, mystified by the magnitude

and intensity of the world. silently blessed by the

sprinkling rain fall, my breath turning swiftly into

steam, the cold stealing what little air I had left.

Driving home safe, much like you insisted,

turning over everything, recounting every moment

and realizing, that this is something that I'll

just have to hand up quietly to the stars



let them decide."

I simply love this! Well done.

[Pink Poison]

Very nice...I like the last stanza, it's sad but the whole poem, overall has a sense of acceptance that verges on hopefulness. I love these lines:

"turning over everything, recounting every moment
and realizing, that this is something that I'll
just have to hand up quietly to the stars"

They're so powerful, because that's ultimately what we all have to do...turn things over to the heavens, and let go of our part of it. Great work as usual.

[Sun Dog]

You have a depth in your words that I envy! I loved every line and even thoughth esubject matter is bleak, I didn't get a sense that it is inescapeable. Does that make sense? Anyway, I think this is well written.

PJ

[MagicHearted Knight]

i like this a lot, this is really good stuff.

[Chuck]

I really love this, and the end is totally fantastic. :}