Mistaken Existence

those in the know, know, and you know

Mistaken existence

who has the power to judge

to belittle and begrudge

who has the power to name me

give me value, worth

I am neither cattle nor chattel

I am f*****g me

the mistaken existence

warps boundaries, infects memories

taints the tainted

in every way

every day

your power to judge fades

as I grow older, wiser

a misplaced tree

bonded by roots

bowing and bending in the wind

your words of hurt and shame

are like fog against my trunk

the lichen laugh

and the moss is unmoved

and although I don't belong

the forest is mine/ my home

a pear tree in the apple orchard

I am f*****g me

you cannot put value on me

that right died

long before it was born

the mistaken existence

does not exist

for I exist

so you are f*****g wrong

I refuse to carry the burden

of you

and your mistakes

robins dance upon my branches

insects tickle and bite

and the neighbours don't mind

that I am a pear shaped thing

I am f*****g me

Reviews

[John the Baptist]

A lot of unique images and similes in this one. The speaker's tone is one of anger and defiance toward an unnamed addressee who has apparently verbally abused him. The degree of the intensity of feeling behind the words gives the impression it is someone close, whose opinion mattered greatly in the past. There may have been some sort of betrayal involved. Whatever, I don't see a rift this deep being healed anytime soon.

[gram linski]

it's more a general rant to the world about acceptance and people who judge others for being different, thanks for reading, John,

[barleygirl]

Of all the poetry I read here at the cafe, you are the one who blurts out bitterness that's the most volatile & this poem is exhibit A. I haven't yet made friends with my anger in writing, so that's why I admire you for embracing this aspect of being human. As a very independent person myself, I totally relate to this message. I'm kinda cranked over it becuz I spent too much of my life allowing others to define or judge my existence. Finally it's become so easy for me to blow off those who don't get me. Why do humans feel the need to hang around people they don't get & offer a commentary? If you don't get me, get away from me. I love that aspect of your msg (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[gram linski]

hey, Margie, thanks, not sure about the blurting out bitterness part, lol, and I have read some of your rants, when you are not molesting Fedex guys you have quite a wicked tongue,

[barleygirl]

When I express anger, it's flippant. When you express anger, it's deeply festering & authentic, like I can feel it from your words. That's the realness I've never done with regards to expressing anger . . .

[gram linski]

wait a minute did you just call my poem deeply festering, ? :} wink wink,

[barleygirl]

It's been a long damn time since I've been deeply festering . . . after spending a month writing this book (which has prompted me to throw my keyboard across the room and masturbate on many occasions) is about as close as I've come to that whole festering kinda vibe . . . heh! heh! heh!

[gram linski]

does throwing your keyboard make you horny then, or are they separate, I usually need my keyboard close by when I masturbate, my first wank chat at the café, woohoo

[barleygirl]

yyyyyeeeeeeaaaaahhhhh!

[gram linski]

how was it for you, haha

[barleygirl]

I'm eternally indebted to ya fer providing lift off this fine brisk morn.

[gram linski]

any time I can lend a metaphoric hand, wink wink,

[Chris Shaw]

We are all unique in our own way, and we should not cast judgements on those who choose to live a different type of life. Uniqueness should be celebrated, not put down. You have a strong voice here and I detect a how dare you, type of anger. Maybe you are directing these lines towards someone who you feel has wronged you, or maybe it's a gram rant. Great poetic expression here and your imagery top notch. You are on fire :)

Chris

[gram linski]

thanks Chris, aye is a typical gram rant, but being a tree I'm not sure about the fire part, lol, thanks as ever for reading and enjoying,

[Eilis]

I find this poem to be a powerful invocation of the sacredness of the individual. Reading the passionate indictment against the ones who seek to belittle, I feel a bit of a battle call stirring somewhere in the old rib cage.

I like the way you move back and forth between the softer images of the individual which present a kind of wholeness to my mind-- and the harshness of the judgment. The laughing lichen and the stoic mosses--these are soft and beautiful symbols of defiance in the face of attack. Each organism is dependent on the other in some way, and that symbiotic relationship is put on display here in a way that counters the belittlement and highlights the spurious nature of the attack.

And then, the community that surrounds the tree. The tree is not alone, but part of a larger frame in which other creatures see it for what it is and get on with the business of life with joy and acceptance. This point/counterpoint narrative that you've developed makes the harshness seem that much more unacceptable in the light of all the good things that the tree can be outside of itself and in itself.


It's a powerful poem, Gram. I appreciate what it has to say very much, and will carry the idea ahead of me.

[gram linski]

carry the idea, Eilis for it is true, no f****r can put value on us, we are pear trees in the apple orchard and except for the farmer's wife, no one else gives a f**k, lol, thanks for your inspiring review, as ever, lol, and please carry my ideas inside your head long into the harvest moon, and by the way the battle cry is, I am f*****g me,

[Robert Trakofler]

Us old trees have the will of ages and the battle scars of resplendent graces:) The folly of admonishment to us is a fleeting endeavor tho our eyes may be failing we see far clearer than the ones of whom would judge. I always used to joke to people in bars to never mess with an old razorback there is a reason they have those grey streaks and it isn't from losing in battle:) Stand tall (and pear shaped) old friend we know your beauty!

[gram linski]

haha, old razor backs with grey streaks don't exist unless they are hardy b******s, noticed a few grey streaks in your goatee, lol, thanks B, and your beauty is defined by your photos on line, yes I am a cheeky c**t,

[Einstein Noodle]

i love the metaphor and personifications you have used with exquisite stinging rebuke ... how we judge and judge and judge ... learned by being judged ... unlearned by some with age .. and thickening of our bark .... and lessening of our other "BARK!" ;) well said sir ... great use of metaphor and personifications says i!
E.

[gram linski]

Hey, E, thanks man, always enjoy your comments not sure about lessening the BARK, but the old teeth are going so the bite is going a bit, lol,

[Einstein Noodle]

ahahahahaha true dat my friend! :)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

this reminds me of growing up....and even into my college years...others who wanted to pigeonhole me into being someone they all wanted me to be...
and the disappointment when i wasn't....and then in my later years, and theirs...how we came to some sort of peace with who i was and who they were.
i relate so much to this write.
j.

[gram linski]

thanks j. once again you are spot on, we seem to spent our whole lives worrying about what others think, rather than just being ourselves