The Unkindness of ravens

                           Midnight black

feathers of despair

      tickle

sorrow and shame

              into life

diamond pure          beaks

          rat

            atat

               tat

                 tatting

on the dusty unwashed

windows of my soul

                          golden talons,

                                            Samurai 

                                             sharp

honed in the furnace of 

           extinction

          ripping through sinew and

                                      bone

the

carrion hunters                     feasting

           

         on still beating

meat

            empty of everything but

            congealed poisoned love

the dark fluttering silhouette ,

                                   moonlight

    enhanced      projected

onto same -like

             flickering eyelids

            and the soundtrack to dreams ;

the incessant scratching

and squawking and screeching

of a thousand carnivorous

              kings

            rat

               atat

                    tat

            rat

               atat

                    tat

            rat

               atat

                    tat ...  

     … forevermore ...              

Reviews

[R.E. Ray]

Ah, those damned ravens, always scratching, squawking and screeching... horrible music, that sorrow and shame, those deeds and things we can't undo or do again. Forevermore our history lives in those haunting black birds. A poem that brings not only images but horrifying sounds and pain. I also like the random, chaotic format in this one, gram.

[gram linski]

Cheers R.E. I too really like the random chaotic format, didn't really have one when I started typing, it sort of wrote its self

[Lea Sheryn]

You have captured the ravens with your words. Filthy birds.

[gram linski]

Haha, once again thanks for your fairly ambivalent great review, lol

[Lea Sheryn]

You're welcome. Happy to oblige. :-))

[gram linski]

lol, I hoped that would be your answer, deja vu !

[barleygirl]

This is one of the best poems I've read that illustrates how a situation looks/feels/sounds/foments. . . for me it's the f****n' blue jays pilfering my strawberries all summer . . . your poem describes the insanity that overtakes me when I hear a dozen clustered around my back deck squawking. I could almost be driven to shooting off random rounds, my neighbors be damned! Your poem conjures up all that slobbery fomenting I've left behind since my surroundings are now rife with wild berries (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[gram linski]

haha, you know what nectar those blue jays really want, (wink, wink,)

[barleygirl]

This poem of yours helped me foment up this morning's poem about how bad the flies were this past summer . . .

[Dave Brown]

I enjoyed this because I enjoy both ravens and crows
I am squawked a hello each time I walk out the front door and when we park for coffee down at the shore they know we are an easy make for hands full of goodies
Nicely done

[gram linski]

sounds idyllic we get mauled by seagulls, thanks Dave glad you enjoyed,

[Robert Trakofler]

The irony is the crow is one of only a handful of animals to have facial recognition so he may remember you while he is dining upon your carcass:) I love ravens always have had a love affair with them they are a mysterious creature and evoke so much emotion from us... Love this poem too Gram gives a tantalizing hint to Poe's the Raven. and a fine testament to those bleak black birds:)

[gram linski]

haha, they always seem to be the bad guys/ harbingers of doom, in horror movies but didn't Noah send them forth to find land,

[Pryde Foltz]

A wonderful play on Poe. Loved it. You also made it your own. I did a reading once of the Raven. It lurks around thee parts somewhere:)

[gram linski]

thanks Pryde, the only time I thought ol' Ed was the last line, you have a great voice, would love to hear the Raven in your accent, send me a link,

[Pryde Foltz]

I think I may post it here in a week or two but here is a link for a sneak peak ...https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VMZhHE4vwKw

[jacob erin-cilberto]

what an excellent tribute to Poe....and his Raven poem...this is more like a cabin in the mind...and the rat atat tat...of ideas coming to the poet, pecking at him or her until the writing starts...and in modern day until we start tap tap tapping the keys...ripping through the sinew and bone of the contentious muse...who comes late night...spurs us to write forevermore.
very cool write, gram.
j.

[gram linski]

not really a tribute to Poe, but the cabin in the mind part rings true, that was pretty much what I was unthinking as some other unwrote this down, cheers j.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i still think Poe would have appreciated it!
:))))

[Eilis]

Your last line ricochets off of the history of introspective and macabre writing and makes me start over reading. A great dynamic format can make the poem something living, especially when the words feel like they fell on the page that way naturally. That’s how it feels here to me.

Dusty unwashed windows of my soul is a line I covet in this. It speaks to something in us where we can’t quite reach to correct a certain view or sense of our own presence. The untouchable part of the person that nevertheless seems to have bearing on the walking talking body.

I recently watched a documentary about Poe that kind of debunked a lot of the myths surrounding his persona. He was just the artist trying to impress something he felt was important on the world while making a decent living. Took it all very seriously. I like that you went with forevermore at the end because that sort reminds me of how that works. I know that’s not what your poem is about, but I think there’s the sense of being followed here. Of wishing or reaching for something that remains out of reach.

The reaching when it feels unreachable is sometimes what keeps it all going. This is dark, looming writing but at the same time there’s the search that’s coming through. So the darkness is not allowed to (finally) be king.

I’ve probably just wandered down the garden path, but there you go. I really like this poem.

[gram linski]

thanks Eilis, covet away, I owe you one, not really based on the Raven as such, I recently heard that a collection of ravens was called an unkindness, and that phrase kinda simmered in my head for a couple of days and then this poem leaked from the pen, didn't put much thought into the content or meaning just went with the flow of the wine and the ink, glad you liked it, personally I love this poem, one of my best, lol,

[gram linski]

for what I was really thinking read j.s review, the cabin in the mind …, even his reviews are poetry, gotta love the guy,

[John Alexander McFadyen]

F**k! just face it Japan were too good for us today!

[gram linski]

aye, fucked it in the first half,, thanks for your kind review …,