The Black Wolf

The green eyed beast,

the black wolf,

is f*****g my brain

in delirium

it's found a niche

to live and grow,

a dark unopened room

deep inside,

running riot in the halls

snarling,

stamping out flowered beauty

leaving only the acrid taste

of piss, and rust

decay and disease

The green eyed beast

the black wolf

minion of me

I feed it daily

I lactate my heart's blood

into its ferocious maw

I nurture its paranoia

and feed the greed

sensing its lupine tendrils

touching every thought

breaking through my broken teeth

and leaving me lost,

in a mist of pure

purest green

outside the black wolf

inside,

Reviews

[Eilis]

I've heard people call it the black dog, but the wolf does seem a bit more apt when the darkness of the mind is all-consuming. I like the way you contrast the two colors (green and black) and keep coming back to them over and over. When depression is a presence it is the primary presence and I know in my deepest moments I've spent more time than I'd care to admit thinking only of feeling. It's not a place I look forward to, but, funnily, it is easy to forget when times are smoother.

Like child-birth I suppose. They say if women remembered the pain they would be less likely to opt to have a child again. It's true (for me anyway). And, I suppose there are things I have done that have made my mental illness worse over the years, but in the thick of it--the black wolf is normally camped out in his cave resting up. Maybe this is just my own tangent.

I don't know. I thought this was haunting and poignant. Excellent evocation of the darkness that can also be alluring at times.

[gram linski]

Hey Ellis, thanks so much for the review, I have spent my fair share of time immersed in darkness and also sought it out at times, It's been ever present in my life, (sometimes, all the time,) and yet the black wolf hasn't eaten me yet, nor you, they say that if men could experience child birth, we would die out in two generations, lol

[Lea Sheryn]

Deliciously dark and forbidding.

[gram linski]

Much like chocolate and life, lol glad you liked it , thanks for the read,

[Lea Sheryn]

Exactly! You're so very welcome.

[Chris Shaw]

Ugh, what goes on in the mind can be terrifying. Reads like paranoia, and I know people who have suffered from that and their lives can be hell. Good reading.

Chris

[gram linski]

Not quite paranoia, but definitely a strange kind of something crawling roon ma brain, cheers, Chris

[Chris Shaw]

Them crawlies ain't good.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Ah if your black wolf met my black dogs..........................................................You capture such deeply distressing, dispairing guilt and feeings of being tormented by thoughts inside, a brand of anger and resentment waiting to be released against self or others. A black wolf can indeed wreck such destruction.

[gram linski]

The only destruction my lupine mind does, these days is with an eagle feather and a vial of virgin blood, lol

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Virgin blood? Where the f**k did you find that?!

[gram linski]

In a virgin, Doh,

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Oobvious when you put your mind to it!
Not many of them in Scotland fella!

[gram linski]

my mind is from outer space, dude, plenty of grey matter in the dark matter, just waiting to be found (out)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

paranoia can just destroy us...makes our brains decay, makes our spirit decay, makes our self-esteem decay..
chews us up...feeds within our minds...killing our insides...the broken prey.
really like the dark images here...."its" is possessive, no apostrophe...
good write.
j.

[gram linski]

Thanks for the grammatics, lol,glad you liked it, j.