Spider's touch

I was the cuckold's friend

In the dead regime

I was the scarlet fog

In the dead daydream

You were the minor steps

In some soldier's dance

I was the perfect picture

Of your ignorance

I was the bleeding rose

In your tortured head

You were the bleeding heart

In my trammelled bed

I was the friendly web

Into which you came

You were the last resort

With admitted shame

Reviews

[John Alexander McFadyen]

A series of sinister couplets that end in a web of deceit as the guy reels in his catch. Very creepy fella but well writ indeed says I (paraphrasing Einstein).

[gram linski]

sounds like you are calling me a very creepy fella, probably not far from the truth, lol, thanks for delving in past page 3,

[barleygirl]

I love the way you weave your extended metaphor like a spider, giving us vivid glimpses of all the ways we can play the fool. I agree with Chris, that last couplet is a slap across the face. I wonder if anyone exists in the world who doesn't get a tormented flashback reading that! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[gram linski]

Thanks Margie, been on both sides of the slap, , neither side is great,, cheers to all you guys for reading one of my faves

[barleygirl]

I've looked at these romps from both sides now and still somehow it's those horny urges I recall, I really don't know romps at all!

[Chris Shaw]

Your last couplet is a killer gram. "

" You were the last resort
With admitted shame"

This takes the biscuit and has got me laughing. Funny and naughty.

Chris

[Carol Cashes]

This was a sly and witty version of "I-was-fakin'-it!" and "I-only-married-you-for-your-money!" and "I-always-HATED-your-meatloaf!".

Very, very sly and witty.....

[gram linski]

Thanks, Carol, you have a very sly and witty way of reviewing,

[Eilis]

I like the dynamic of this poem. Can’t believe there aren’t any reviews on it yet.

It makes me think of the idea of ‘just following orders,’ and how that can spiral into some very ugly places.

But there’s also that undergirding of a distant love element that I recognize in a lot of your poems. Like something that’s ever-present but less often openly acknowledged.

The shame of the final word seems to be an elusive recognition of a theme. Something that runs deep through the forest of the poem.

I don’t want to say too much. I like the mystery of this poem. I’m going to close the door and let it keep maturing in private.

[gram linski]

Well, this is a blast from the past, glad you liked it, don't let it mature in private too long it may fester, lol