Wash

It's kind of sick

She sent me four purple hearts

just now

you sent me back

to hell

 

Your perfume's like a panic

and just one whiff's never

enough

to fully un-relax

 

My jokes are Japanese

to you

demonic mutterings

I'm clever like a fox

not

rabid like a dog

 

There are so many others

who understand me

or could pretend to

but you're so good at getting mad

that I'm howling at the door

for scraps

begging for a pat

or kiss

or a little

purple heart

 

I'm sick of you I hardly even think

of you

only when the others

scratch my ears and

say good boy do I

wonder what she's doing,

the girl who wasn't bright enough to

laugh

or sweet enough

or strong enough

or free enough

 

You reminded me of me

but I could never be that cruel to you

except on here

where I can cut you up

real nice

and never

let you know

 

I guess I am the dog-

can't make you laugh

can't make you cry

can't make you want to make a joke

remind me that you used to want-

 

Oh, forget it

my mind's a slaughter shower

fizzing up with poison

my skin

is peeling off

and all that's there

is raw

and black

and cracked

and humorless

like you

 

I try and try and try

to rinse you off

but all that goes is more

of me

 

I thought I'd help you

on the floor

breathe for you a little

as the air slipped out

trace your knee

as it gushed

on tile

whirled into a drain

a drain

I'd disappear inside of

just to taste a little longer

just to be the one

to save you

 

I know what you saw 

in those eyes of mine

as the fumes hissed and

putrefied our getaway

I'm cold and I am shaking

I want to be your hero

I want your purple heart

I want to be the hero

 

You poison me with just

a look

a pause

an absence of a smile

you'd rather die than

let me save you or

let me even try

Reviews

[~]

I liked this one Thaddius. You've managed really well to express the ever nagging feeling you feel when you cannot get what you wish for.
Some people do not want to be rescued.