The Catch

Blameless, like a rotting fish beneath the deck, she lurks

and leaks into the pool I thought I'd keep her living in.

I caught her and she wasn't big enough to fry,

but pretty,

and came up easy,

so I had to keep her as a souvenir.

I would never dry her out and mount her on a wall,

because she's not ironic or remarkable,

but she came so easy that I had to honor her another way.

 

She swims a shallow circle in the keep,

too bold to compromise, 

or too close to death,

nudging those already dead that bob into her path.

Her dorsal fin cuts smiles that burn into my mind then disappear,

an etch-a-sketch demonic,

behind her, slanting dotted lines in menstrual brown,

a trickle of what makes her her.

 

I'll let her die in there,

of poison from the other ones,

the carcass water and separating s**t she'll gasp for in the end;

who knows,

maybe she'll taste a cousin

or a mother.

She won't live long enough to starve,

but if she could I'd like her to asphyxiate,

skewered on the wheel of blood and sinking,

drowning in herself.

 

She swims and swims and swims and it's like she doesn't understand that she was caught.

She's playful with the dead,

motoring along so patient I might snatch her out and club her,

slow,

so I can check firsthand if her head's that empty.

 

But it would be too quick.

The fish would win.

She has to die in spirit.

 

She thinks I adopted her, and

this is her new family,

she thinks this is a housewarming,

a baby shower,

that all these dead are staging a production of Macbeth and when I yell 'cut!' they'll bulge their lidless eyes and swish their tails and zip into her circle, into a

school of my rejected meals,

my unworthy mounts,

my cast of friends that she can lead into awakening,

a mass exodus beneath the deck I can't un-see,

it's seared into my eyeball,

I can't blink it away,

I'm lidless,

I'm swishing and swimming and following her,

I'm sinking as she leads a charge against me;

I'm watching from above and the noon is buzzing,

I'm baited to her fretted path until I

faint from heat exhaustion or

throw her back.

Reviews

[K.]

Well.. he does it again! Currently wondering why you are a famous published writer.

So, I was copy and pasting lines into my review as I read but when I finished, I realized I had most of your poem (awkward). I had also added it to my library before I had even finished the poem! I can't even get my thoughts onto my computer from my head, and I really wish I could because this poem deserves one heck of a review. I can see the scene playing out right in front of me, and how you described what you were feeling makes me feel like I was actually you in the situation.

Throughout the poem I found myself smiling, fascinated, and drawn in to the very end because I had to see how it would end, and your words are just addictive. Can't wait to read more because this was fantastic.

[Thaddius]

thanks! I just remembered: I wrote this sci-fi prose, called 'Suburb Zone part 1 and 2'. It's really garbage, and I know why, but if you like prose, you might want to check it out. My garbage has its virtues. (If you want to know why it's bad, I can tell you)

[K.]

"Garbage", pfft. I'll check it out in the morning when I can actually process the greatness ha

[Fran Marie]

The catch was not worth the chase..too easy makes it hard to appriciate..great description and details within this piece...well written..

[AYVID]

Great expressions of contempt and disgust for the fish. The poet finds her an easy catch and maybe thats why the disdain for her and his other rejected meals. He wants to finish off with her and dispose her off quickly and relegate her to the back of his mind along with his other unworthy mounts. But wait, she may have a new trick up her sleeve after all.

I found a very intriguing, misogynist touch to this poem. For some reason I also found good humor in it. You are a very convincing writer.

[Chloe Grant]

Gorgeous, absolutely gorgeous. The imagery is amazing and it makes me feel like I'm there and I'm feeling everything that you're feeling. I love it.

[Thaddius]

jeeze thanks a bunch! Making you suffer how I suffered is my ultimate goal, even though the suffering does transmute into something more euphoric in the consciousness exchange

[Brandon S. Whitten]

Splendid read and write. Love the imagery and passion expressed.

[Thaddius]

thanks man I appreciate the kind words

[Brandon S. Whitten]

You are welcome.

[R J Askew]

Like the playfully disdainful notion of the pretty little souvenir fish leaking into the pool. And the notion of the fish being unremarkable and lacking in irony completes her ruin. 'Those already dead' tells us that the catcher is no novice. 'Dorsal fin cut smile' and 'etch-a-sketch' are pleasingly arch. And that which makes 'her her' is supremely dismissive. 'The carcass water' is a great turn of phrase, not exactly something we'd like a litre of to get out day going, but beautifully Baudelairean. 'I'd like her to asphyxiate', shows a certain twisted glee. 'She doesn't understand', reveals a sinister patience, and the desire to 'club her slow' and check up on things shows a depth of deviant imagination at work. But no, the master sees that this wld be all wrong. That nice little three line verse is like a bull-fighter striking a pose, head stiffly erect. And so to the sword thrusting final verse. Actually, it's a climactic torrent where the narrator seems to become engaged in some frenzied act with hit captive and ends - exhausted ecstatically. The 'baby shower' is a marvellous violence of mind as it uses a symbol of innocence to emphasise something that is the opposite of innocence. 'She thinks.. She thinks..' wound, cut, slash, dismiss. But the catcher can't quiet let go of his catch and may himself he caught, trapped by another of his 'unworthy mounts' perhaps. Ach, the enervation and self-loathing in the dismount leaks into the reader's mind most brilliantly. I feel exhausted - but only in the best way possible. Poor little fishy-wishy!

[Thaddius]

Hahahaha. You have a comprehensive understanding of this. Thanks for taking the time!

I really wanted to do evil here, and your adjectives 'disdainful, dismissive, twisted, sinister, deviant' affirm this. A part of me wants the reader to turn on the narrator, call him misogynist, a monster... there's a masochism, a self-loathing, as you say. It makes me wonder how far I can go for people on this site to despise me for my writing. I might write a torture one next. But thank you, because more than any other review you acknowledged how much I hurt that fish, and that legitimizes it somehow. Otherwise the 'fish' seems let off the hook, in a way.

[Ishmael V Huette]

I actually had to read it more than once to really let it sink in. Your MSG in the poem is very powerful, if I had to sum it in one word that is. I absolutely love the imagery in the poem, how your describing what I first thought was a fish but then, it all connects with sort of a scandalous female as your story unfolds. If that makes sense.

[Thaddius]

oh she is scandalous. and I wasn't unaware that I might come across as scandalous as well, talking about her like that. Somehow the extended metaphor appears to have protected me... curious

[Thaddius]

thanks for the review and nice words!

[BThomvanWart]

When I first read it, I thought "A poem about fishing...?" but then I caught on. It's not about fishing, at least, not the deeper message. It's a strong, common message that most guys know of, but I like the way it's told. The whole "There's plenty of fish in the sea" line has been blown up into a large, slightly slanted work of modern art. Your writing style is fantastic, I wasn't bored when I read this. I wanted to learn more and more until finally, the last line was in my sight. This was a great piece.

[Thaddius]

thanks so much, I appreciate the kind words. I never thought of that 'there's plenty' line, but you are right, it's definitely a mainstream allegory, albeit shallow and undeveloped.

[BThomvanWart]

Nah, it's not a shallow and undeveloped idea. You wrote the piece very well.

[Thaddius]

No I mean the line itself. I know mine isn't shallow lol

[BThomvanWart]

Ah. Sorry about the misunderstanding! Lol.

[yuki]

very interesting and deep I like it. Great job.
~yuki

[Thaddius]

thanks very nice of you to say

[Miles W.]

Very interesting. I couldn't personally find anything that connected to me, but that's my personal opinion. The poem flows very well and has great structure. Well done sir!

[Thaddius]

I wish I couldn't connect to the themes. Glad you took the time to read, thanks