Senryu #1

A Senryu

‘Grounds will quake,’ blusters

the poet, whirling high up

on a termite roof

Reviews

[KAin]

Diligent and unceasing, the termite is a symbol of fertile work and perseverance, persistence. The quaking grounds, a suggestion of a sudden change, either imminent or current - a question of sudden upheavals formulates in the mind. And the poet's reaction - a stunned bluster with the air of hapless - but somehow also a happy - resignation. A curious blend of emotions, the poem suggests a change - an "othering" - even as it exhibits it in itself. Well written, Thaddius.

[Lyn Anderson]

A really clean and sophisticated Senryu

[Beaner166]

I really like the simplicity and complexity of this piece. Very well done.

[TheSearcher]

Simple, short, deep and different. Like it.

[VertoAtrum]

Fascinating, I like it =] Good job

[DIVYA]

Very good senyru. Nice work.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

and if he keeps blustering, his roof will collapse---

i feel this poet wonders if his writing is too infested with either monotony, or too much wordiness, and its foundation is shaking, ready to collapse.

[Thaddius]

Yes. This poet imposes limits/structure (like a senryu, a gimmick) on his work to strike awe in his peers, and he dances on those limits in superiority. Those same limits (and perhaps the impulse for them) are his downfall, and threaten to quake and tumble his ground and fulfill his prophecy in backwards fashion..

[Daniel Dawes]

Liked it........short but interesting. Thanks for sharing :)